I think it's fun to read them all in succession, but if you'd like to just read the best bits, check out the bold entries.
Don't forget to check out the Facebook page Tom Hamilton has the Best Home Run call in all of Baseball for awesome home-run calls which could never be captured in print.
And yes I know this isn't just the best of Tom Hamilton, but Mike Hegan and Jim Rosenhaus too.
Enjoy!
Radio Chatter April 1 - July 11:
"If you didn't know better, based on the weather and the score, the Browns are making a comeback against the Bears!"
- Tom Hamilton
"Bob Uecker says that [Chicago pitcher] Chris Sale is so thin that you can see his wallet from the front."
- Tom Hamilton
"As hot as the White Sox have been so far, that is how good Masterson is pitching today."
- Tom Hamilton
"It wasn't easy but Chris Perez notches save number one here in 2011. And the Red Sox are winless after four."
- Tom Hamilton
"There's no love lost between the Koreans and the Japanese. [...] And for the first time ever, Daisuke Matsuzaka has given up a run at the corner of Carnegie and Ontario."
- Tom Hamilton (talking about the national baseball teams not the nations)
"How good are one dollar hot dogs? Even Buck Showalter doesn't have anything bad to say about Dollar Dog Night."
- Tom Hamilton
"I'm not sure if it's the time change or what but I just looked at the clock and we're one hour ahead of where we were last night."
- Mike Hegan (commenting on the length of last night's game)
"If that restaurant doesn't have windows, someone has a large crouton in their salad."
- Tom Hamilton, regarding Hafner's homer off the face of the restaurant at Safeco Field.
"...thank you Milton."
- Tom Hamilton in response to Milton Bradley's error which allowed an un-earned run
"That's why your shortstop is the cutoff man. He's not out there to WAVE at Milton Bradley, you're supposed to throw to him. Oh well..."
- Tom Hamilton, still milling over Milton's error
"The umpires are all off-season dentists, and they tell him he's fine, put the mask back on."
- Tom Hamilton, NOT in response to Milton Bradley, but in response to a delay of game while one of the umpires asks the other umpires about his tooth
"[Milton Bradley] has plugged his ears with cotton. Good lord."
- Tom Hamilton
"If Bradley strikes out here, he'll need more than cotton in his ears."
- Tom Hamilton
"If I told you the Indians were 16-12 in the month of April, you'd probably say 'Oh, ok.' But if your team goes 4 over .500 every month of the season, suddenly you're 24 games over .500 by the end of the season."
- Tom Hamilton
"Cabrera grabs the ball and throws to...the other Cabrera..."
- Tom Hamilton
"Tim McClellan likes to be Santa Claus and not tell anyone what's in the present. Nobody in the ballpark - players, fans - has any idea what the call is until he waves his finger."
- Tom Hamilton
"Only in Disney Land can a monkey become everybody's favorite pet."
- Tom Hamilton, talking about the Rally Monkey. Yeah, that is a thing.
"Looking at the next batters, it's the Angels' 3, 4 and 5 hitters. So if you're going to finish off the Angels, you're going to earn it!"
- Tom Hamilton
"Never thought I'd come to Anaheim and there would be Fleece Blanket Night"
- Tom Hamilton
"Fausto Carmona - he's pitched gallantly tonight. Dan Heran has simply pitched better."
- Tom Hamilton
"What Kendrick got there is called a Little League home run."
- Tom Hamilton in response to Anaheim's Kendrick scoring on an error after hitting a double.
"Travis Hafner with a deep drive to right center. Can mother nature knock it down? No! Travis Hafner..into the teeth of the wind has his third home run! [...] And Pronk is back!"
- The Poetic Tom Hamilton
"Today's birthday wishes go to Helen Molnar. Ninety-four years young. Her actual birthday is this coming Tuesday, but she plays bingo on weeknights and she won't be home. Hey, nothing like a good game of bingo! [...] Hope it's a good night at the bingo parlor, Helen!
- Tom Hamilton
"Didn't realize it was 'steal a t-shirt' night at Great American Ball Park."
- Tom Hamilton's final words after his half-inning rant about Reds pitcher Mike Leake getting arrested for shoplifting six t-shirts
"With Sizemore at first and Asdrubal Cabrera at the plate, there isn't much you can't do."
- Tom Hamilton
"It's a two run [10th] inning and the fans are flocking to the parking lot."
- Tom Hamilton
"I've never seen that before! It literally bounced off the ground and hit Cabrera. Can this game get any wackier?!"
- Tom Hamilton (the game wasn't particularly wacky...I think he's been on the road too long)
"Grady Sizemore showing why he's a Gold-glover, and why this ballclub is a contender."
- Tom Hamilton
"If you talk to the Royals they are happy as heck that Zach Greinke is gone from Kansas City. He was a bit of a Negative Nellie in the clubhouse..."
- Tom Hamilton
"They got soft here in Minneapolis once they got the Metrodome. They didn't have to fight the blizzards to watch the Vikings at old Metropolitain Stadium. Nobody got softer than our engineer, Wayne."
- Tom Hamilton
"One thing stays consistent - the Indians can't get a left-handed hitter out."
- Tom Hamilton
"'Do you believe in miracles?' as Al Michaels once said. The Indians need one here."
- Tom Hamilton
"It's only a matter of time before Minnesota wakes up, and starts to play winning baseball. You just don't want to be the team that gets them going."
- Tom Hamilton
"Ohio State has 4000 people to see the band play before the game."
- Tom Hamilton, commenting on the sorry state of Minnesota Gophers football
"The tag is on Morneau...AND HE IS OUT BY EIGHT FEET! ... So Choo retires more hitters in the third than Carrasco did."
- Tom Hamilton at the end of the third inning
"It's amazing how many people that write for a living can't come up with an original thought. How can you all be writing about the same thing....nobody was writing it a year ago."
- Tom Hamilton's reaction to all of the recent stories that Joe Mauer should be moved from catching
"Gomez needs to pitch well, because if he doesn't there's a guy named Alex White knocking on the door."
- Tom Hamilton
"Cabrera hits one by Ka'aihue at first, who has the range of a statue."
- Tom Hamilton
"If he gets hot - LOOK OUT!"
- Tom Hamilton re: Shin-Soo Choo
"Justin Masterson has a good chance to be 5-0 in about a half hour."
- Tom Hamilton
"HOW ABOUT THAT?! Bases loaded, nobody out and Pestano takes care of the 4- 5- and 6-batters for the Royals!"
- Tom Hamilton
"Folks, if you don't like Shelley Duncan, take a good look in the mirror. The problem will be staring back at you."
- Tom Hamilton
"Is it that hard to let everyone know what the call is? Is his right arm that heavy?"
- Tom Hamilton
"Now, what in the world...why, in the month of April, should a team from the west coast play a team from Florida in a dome? It's not that hard to make the schedule. It's idiotic."
- Tom Hamilton
"Manny Acta's faith never has waivered on Santana. And never has a manager's faith had such a big return."
- Tom Hamilton
"There isn't a prettier ballpark than this one when it fills up like it did tonight. There's a new energy at the corner of Carnagie and Ontario."
- Tom Hamilton
"Looking at his jersey, he's got letters starting at his waist, going up and ending again at his waist."
- Tom Hamilton, commenting on Al Alburquerque
"He only weighs about a hundred pounds. [...] If his name was Saltalamacchia it would go all the way around his number. He only needs a few more letters."
- Mike Hegan's take on Alburquerque's name
"You're saying 'Why not go to Everett?' and it's because Jack Hannahan, against left handed pitching this year, is hitting .529."
- Tom Hamilton
"Jim Leyland, who normally has a cigarette going, has smoke coming out of his ears."
- Tom Hamilton on Brennan Boesch's first-pitch popup with a man at second in the 13th inning.
"...Unfortunately, April is over."
- Tom Hamilton
"You can buy a baseball team when you record a song like 'Rudoplh the Red Nosed Reindeer'. [...] Just think, every time your kids sing 'Rudolph' Gene Autrey is making money."
- Tom Hamilton regarding Gene Autrey's ownership of the Angels
"Proof again that a Buckeye is always tougher than a Gaucho. What is a Gaucho, Tony? It's sort of a horse? A Spanish horseman. Well, how many Spanish horsemen can play volleyball?"
- Tom Hamilton regarding the OSU men's volleyball winning the national championships over USC Santa Barbara
"Bobby Abreau is going to finish his career at some point...he's 37...and he's going to have one of the greatest careers that nobody's ever talked about."
- Tom Hamilton
"Former Indian Izturas went with Ryan Church to Houston for Scott Stewart. The only thing I can remember about Scott Stewart is that nobody ate more Fudgecicles in the history of the Indians franchise and was less productive than Scott Stewart."
"Scott Stewart was a peacock for the bullpen and he found himself in triple-A awfully quick."
"Were there a lot of Fudgecicles in Buffalo, Rosie?"
"I didn't want to go there, but there was a shortstop gone to Montreal and the Bisons added a relief pitcher who couldn't get anyone out at that level either."
"And it was never his fault."
- Tom Hamilton and Jim Rosenhaus fondly remembering Scott Stewart
"Hey, there's a ball the Angels didn't get! That might be the first one in two games that they didn't make a sensational play on."
- Tom Hamilton on Santana's 4th inning double
"Oh my, what a huge hit for Choo. And it might be be the first time on this road trip that he's been able to take a deep breath and relax. And I can't believe how many Indians fans are here!"
"Tom, I think in addition to Indians fans, I think there's Choo fans."
"You're right, Rosie. Especially out west, the Korean delegation."
"When he came to the plate there was a lot of Choo-ing like at home."
- Tom Hamilton on Choo's 2-run double and the resulting wave of "CHOOOOOO!"
"Well if you like numbers, Jared Weaver in his last three starts against the Indians had given up one run, in three starts. So this again tells you how legitimate this ball club is, Rosie. They're doing it against good pitching they're not just doing it against meatballers."
- Tom Hamilton
"We've got the Angels television feed up here, and when the Angels strike out they don't replay it."
"It's like it never happened."
"Well, we are around the corner from Disneyland."
- Tom Hamilton and Jim Rosenhaus
"You don't see many clubs play a home game on Sunday at 12:35. [...] I guess nobody goes to church out here. Except our engineer Tony!"
- Tom Hamilton
"How many times have we said 'if the Indians could juuuust have a good start to the season...'? I think 18 and 8 is a great start!"
- Tom Hamilton
"I don't know how people can stick their hands out for a ball like that. You might get a free baseball but you'll spend thousands at the orthopedic surgeon to get your fingers re-attached."
- Tom Hamilton regarding a laser Santana foul ball
"A fan in the suites reached out and made a one-handed grab. Everyone is playing defense today at Progressive Field! The good news is that he didn't spill any of his diet Pepsi. The fans below him appreciate it."
- Tom Hamilton
"Will Rhymes gave it a ride, except it was Will Rhymes and not Miguel Cabrera so it's still 5-3."
- Tom Hamilton
"Right there is an example of an out that is simply a foul ball in any other ball park in the major leagues."
- Tom Hamilton
"The chance of the A's signing Adrian Beltre this summer was the same as Rosie and I sprouting wings and flying back to our hotel."
- Tom Hamilton
"Boy, the outfield couldn't play any deeper unless they were sitting on the wall."
- Tom Hamilton
"'Enjoy the journey'...that's the motto Stephanie Hagel has driven in to those of us who work here. 'Don't worry about whether or not we make it on the air or not, just enjoy the journey and I'll take care of the rest."
"Would you make that statement if it wasn't after midnight back home?"
"Oh sure, I'm livin' on the edge."
- Tom Hamilton and Jim Rosenhaus
"This would be a great way to start one of the ruggedest...that's not even a word...before we have every English teacher writing us...this would be a great way to start one of the most rugged road trips in baseball this year."
- Tom Hamilton
"Well if it weren't for David DeJesus, Josh Tomlin is having a perfect game. Sounds stupid, but he gave up a solo home run and got the next 8 batters out..."
- Tom Hamilton
"Let's hope that the lack of closer experience backfires on Balfour."
- Tom Hamilton
"I don't mean to laugh Rosie...but he's not 6 feet. If you're listed at 6 feet, you're 5'10". With every pitch, it looks like his arm is going to disconnect from his body, so you can see why he has command problems."
- Tom Hamilton on Tyler Chatwood
"Chatwood looks like he's 12 years old, and 6 feet is being generous."
- Jim Rosenhaus
"Choo proving that even though he's not swinging the bat so well right now, he's still a deadly weapon with that arm."
- Tom Hamilton
"Sometimes, [playing in your hometown] can be a hassle. People forget that you're here to work, this is not a vacation."
- Tom Hamilton regarding Vinnie Pestano pitching in his hometown of Anaheim
"Boy the Indians have hit some screamers tonight, but right at people."
- Tom Hamilton
"It's playing like the Grand Canyon out here tonight."
- Tom Hamilton regarding the hard-hit fly balls that go nowhere
"Choo with a throw on the fly to home. Aybar would have been out by a mile."
- Tom Hamilton
"The Indians are third in the league in pitching, which sort of gets lots. As tough as the pitching has been for the Indians to face, the same is true for the Angels and Oakland. Runs have been at a premium for both the Indians and their opposition."
- Tom Hamilton
"Marson says he got his hand in there. [Umpire] Doug Eddings says 'I didn't see it that way.'"
- Tom Hamilton
"[Stephanie Hagel] is pushing the Mother's Day envelope, she wants us to do a legal ID. We say all these nice things about Stephanie and she drops the FCC in our lap."
- Tom Hamilton
"It's amazing...when you're having a good year and you've got a winning record...whether or not it's a perception or reality, it sure seems like you get more calls in your favor than when you're having a bad year."
- Tom Hamilton ruminating on a questionable call in the 6th
"I shouldn't shortchange Milton Bradley. He'll be back next weekend too. Now, how long he stays in the game remains to be seen. He's been booted out of at least two games here recently for arguing balls and strikes. We'll also see if he's still wearing earplugs. He's been wearing earplugs at every home game in Seattle. At a HOME ballgame! That ought to be a promotion for the Indians. Have a contest, see who can have the best histrionics to an actor who's an umpire, and get thrown out, and win the best seats in the house."
- Tom Hamilton on the upcoming Mariners series and the return of his favorite player
"Boy does this tell you everything you need to know about this ball club. They just refuse to believe they're ever beaten. And if you talk to Manny Acta, the coaches, any of the players, they'll tell you the same thing. This ballclub always feels like it's going to find a way to win. And talk is cheap - the bottom line is they've gone out and done it this year. That's why they believe it's so that they're going to find ways to win."
- Tom Hamilton after Grady and Asdrubal's back-to-back doubles in the 9th
"Zobrist would like to argue with home plate umpire Dale Scott. Good luck."
- Tom Hamilton
"Well, he didn't go to Lafayette. We say that in jest because Rosie is a graduate of Lafayette. It took him 8 years to get his undergraduate degree."
- Tom Hamilton
"In baseball, the regular season means something, not like in the NBA or the NHL. Not when you have 16 teams in the playoffs."
- Tom Hamilton
"Usually when that happens you're not going to win. But with the kind of season this team is having, who knows."
- Tom Hamilton, regarding the unusually high number of men left in scoring position by the Indians
"The last thing you want is Choo bunting. He can with it with one swing of the bat."
- Tom Hamilton
"It looks to the hitter that there are ten guys in the infield and nobody in the outfield. But you have to hit it to the outfield, that's the key."
- Tom Hamilton on "double play depth"
"Michael, it was a slider! Take one for the team!"
- Mike Hegan on Brantley moving out of the way of a pitch with the bases loaded
"It's literally a walk-off win!"
- Tom Hamilton
"I don't mean to be a Debbie Downer, Fred Griffith, but you got the wrong time to get the Bedford Nissan Grand Slam Payoff. Not with David Price on the mound."
- Tom Hamilton
"Being 5 runs down against David Price, it might as well be 15 runs."
- Tom Hamilton
"If you get hit in the back with one of Price's pitches, you might not take another breath until midnight."
- Tom Hamilton
"It had to come to an end, and if it had to come to an end you'd think it would be against a guy like David Price."
- Tom Hamilton
"Doug Jones used to do that, former Indians pitcher. Slow, slower and slowest."
- Mike Hegan
"...in downtown You Gotta Be Sh*ttin' Me..."
- Tom Bodet in a new Motel 6 commercial
"OUT AT SECOND IS CABRERA! How in the world can you get picked off at second down 5 to 3?!"
- Tom Hamilton shares his disappointment with Orlando Cabrera
"...then again, Palmeiro didn't do anything he just took somebody else's vitamin shot. There's a story to that but we all have families to feed."
- Tom Hamilton regarding Rafael Palmeiro's alleged steroids use
"Albert Pujols has made more news for hugging Joe Strauss than for swinging his bat."
- Tom Hamilton regarding recent Albert Pujols news
"As-lando Cabrera has his second double of the day..."
- Tom Hamilton's quick save
"He sure got comfortable in a hurry!"
- Tom Hamilton's comment on Choo's first-inning homer, after commenting that Choo does not look comfortable at the plate
"Jack Hannahan could not get a hit the rest of the year and he'd still be worth it."
- Tom Hamilton on Hannahan's performance at third base
"Suzuki is surprised that anyone would ever call a strike on him. He's four feet out of the batter's box, I don't know how he would know."
- Tom Hamilton
"Shall he ever come to the will-call window, Tony Sipp will not be leaving tickets."
- Tom Hamilton on Sipp's college coach who told him he'd never make it in the big leagues
"This is the kind of game that makes you think there's something special going on in 2011."
- Tom Hamilton
"That may have been the longest trip to the mound ever."
- Jim Rosenhaus after Tom Hamilton took advantage of some down time to explain how Rosie's induction into the Buffalo Bisons Hall of Fame is starting to affect their jobs
"Not only have the horses left the barn, the barn has burned to the ground."
- Tom Hamilton on the 10-run inning
"You know you've had quite a night offensively when your number eight man in the batting order has been to the plate 6 times. It's like a softball game."
- Tom Hamilton
"[Asdrubal] Cabrera is starting to make either jump throws or throws-off-balance better than any player in the league."
- Tom Hamilton
"Treanor dancing off the bag there. Why, I don't know. It's sometimes more distracting for the hitter than anything."
- Tom Hamilton
"And Matt Treanor gets picked off at second for the final out of the seventh with his club down five! Thank you, thank you, thank you!"
- Tom Hamilton, moments later
"He'd be a bad poker player wouldn't he? He's out there wearing his emotions on his sleeve when he doesn't have that good command."
"Yeah he's an adrenaline guy. If he were a poker player right now Rosie he might throw the deck of cards back at the dealer."
- Jim Rosenhaus and Tom Hamilton on Chris Perez's not-so-awesome 9th
"Carmona was too amped up for his Opening Day assignment. Tried to throw the ball 200 miles per hour."
- Tom Hamilton
"Paul Konerko continues to terrorize Carmona."
- Tom Hamilton
"Travis is going to be out...they say 3 to 4 weeks. But when you say 3 to 4 weeks with an oblique, count on 6 weeks."
- Tom Hamilton
"The only thing missing from this postcard is Harrison Ford and Kelly McGillis."
- Tom Hamilton regarding a "very Amish" postcard the guys got from a person in "Youngstown, Amish country."
"The good news is, by playing so well in the first part of the season, you've built up a bit of a cushion."
- Tom Hamilton
"Once again this team finding a way after being no-hitted for five-and-a-third."
- Tom Hamilton
"What a time for Orlando Cabrera to get his first hit as a US citizen."
- Tom Hamilton
"Think of Goose Gossage. He might have thrown a player over the outfield wall."
- Tom Hamilton on the emotions of relief pitchers
"Oh, Fred Lewis put on a clinic on how not to run the bases!"
- Tom Hamilton on Fred Lewis sort of running himself out to end the game
"Both of these teams tried to throw the game away."
- Mike Hegan
"Josh Tomlin, folks - you spell his name 'winner.'"
- Tom Hamilton
"It looked like a drill that went bad."
- Mike Hegan on the weird double steal/errors in the bottom of the 1st.
"The last time I saw a play like that was at Bleser Park in Avon Lake when [my son] Nick was 8. Little league."
- Tom Hamilton on the weird double steal/errors in the bottom of the 1st.
"Volquez looks like he's wearing a hat that is two sizes too small for his head. Like those kids wore in the Little Rascals. He has to keep tugging and pulling to keep it on. [...] Who the heck is the equipment manager for the Reds? Give the guy a bigger hat!"
- Tom Hamilton
"Michael Brantley has had two hits today that haven't gone 60 feet."
- Tom Hamilton
"Volquez says 'let's go through the signs again' and [Reds catcher] Hernandez says 'you only have 3 pitches.'"
- Tom Hamilton
"The Indians lead it 6-1 and [Reds manager] Dusty Baker is going to the mound to choke Volquez."
- Tom Hamilton
"Another broken belt. I'll have to ask [equipment manager] Tony Amato what the budget for belts is. Asdrubal has exceeded it."
- Tom Hamilton on Asdrubal's second busted belt this weekend
"Oh by the way, on our daily update of oblique injuries, on which we have someone to add every day..."
- Tom Hamilton on the latest injury for the Twins
"When you're getting over 2 baserunners an inning, you're going to score some runs."
- Tom Hamilton's great insight
"First base is open and that didn't look accidental."
- Tom Hamilton on Asdrubal nearly getting hit by a pitch in the 8th
"Brandon has not tortured the Indians this weekend like he normally does."
- Tom Hamilton
"What's really amazing about the Indians on the home portion of this schedule...they've lost four games, they've only lost to two teams [Chicago and Tampa]."
- Tom Hamilton
"Good attempt by Edgar Renteria who five years ago would have made that play."
- Tom Hamilton
"Brandon Phillips...[laughing] he went to tag Orlando Cabrera who had stopped [running to second] and instead they high-fived each other and that completed the tag!"
- Tom Hamilton
"You knew this club was better, but nobody - nobody - foresaw a 29 and 15 record. As Herb used to say, that's why you play the game. Everybody and their brother can make a prediction and 99.9% of the people who make predictions don't have anything at stake so it's easy to predict."
- Tom Hamilton
"Hernandez just kind of lumbering into third [...] Is Ramon Hernandez hurt?"
"I just think Ramon doesn't run too good. He wasn't going to score, Tom. He wasn't going to try down 8 runs."
- Tom Hamilton and Mike Hegan in the 9th
"He is having an MVP-type season."
- Tom Hamilton after Asdrubal's 6th hit in a row
"It's amazing how much velocity Asdrubal Cabrera gets on a throw with both feet off the ground."
- Tom Hamilton
"Clay Buchholz tonight acts like he gets paid by the hour."
- Tom Hamilton on the Red Sox pitcher's slowness
"How about that? If Jack stays on the bag, it's a tie ballgame."
- Mike Hegan after Hannahan caught stealing and Kearns' double in the 5th
"One of the Boston folks was saying tonight that the Red Sox would give anything to get Justin Masterson back."
- Tom Hamilton
"We've not seen Manny Acta this upset in all his time with the Indians."
- Tom Hamilton after Acta got thrown out in the 8th
"What a job by Masterson. He gets a standing ovation and he should."
- Tom Hamilton on Masterson's exit
"That wind, howling out towards right field. That makes everyone a home-run-hitter if you hit it out to right field."
- Tom Hamilton
"Welp, no such thing as a routine 9th inning."
- Tom Hamilton
"What does Cabrera not lead this club in?"
- Tom Hamilton
"I can't remember Boston starting pitchers being so slow. [...] If we had Josh Tomlin working in one of these games it'd be polar opposite of either Beckett or Buchholz."
- Tom Hamilton
"I didn't mean to say 'short and squat' did I? [...] Compact. I wish I would have thought of that first."
- Mike Hegan on Carrera's stature
"Carmonas pitches are going straight down. That's how you know his stuff is working. It's when they go sideways that things go bad."
- Tom Hamilton
"The way Beckett's pitched tonight, 4 to 1 is huge. But the way the Indians play...you never know."
- Tom Hamilton
"It's one thing to struggle. It's another to become...Pittsburgh."
- Tom Hamilton on the Twins' record this year
"Some nights we leave the booth here and say to each other 'how did they do that?' [...] We said that a lot in 2007 too."
- Tom Hamilton
"Now how in the world, with a shift on, did he get that between two guys that are part of a three-man left side of the infield?"
- Tom Hamilton on
"David Ortiz's first infield hit since 1998."
"For sure. When David Ortiz gets an infield hit you know things are going bad."
- Tom Hamilton and Mike Hegan
"Well this is a day when we need [WKYC meteorologist] Betsy Kling to whip up a storm and it needs to get here in 5 minutes and continue all day."
- Tom Hamilton after the 7-run Red Sox first inning
"You sometimes have to lose the battle to win the war."
- Tom Hamilton on making Mitch Talbot give at least 5 innings
"Albert Belle probably lost that award because he and the writers didn't have many group hugs."
- Tom Hamilton on Mo Vaughn winning the MVP over Belle in 1995
"I don't think David Rackley will want to see a replay of his game behind the plate today, for either side."
- Tom Hamilton expresses his disappointment in the home plate umpire
"Don't write any obituaries for David Ortiz just yet. He's still got some pop in that bat and some speed in that bat head."
- Mike Hegan after Ortiz's home run in the 6th
"I don't think I've seen anyone hit the ball as far foul as Shelley Duncan does. I mean, he hit that ball 100 feet foul."
- Mike Hegan
"A new ballpark isn't always the panacea. A new location - like a new city - is sometimes the answer."
- Tom Hamilton regarding the Marlins' new ballpark
"Tried to hit that ball to Sarasota."
- Tom Hamilton on an Evan Longoria swinging strike
"The Indians have 6 games this season on fake grass, turf. And they're all on this road trip. The day Grady Sizemore gets back, they have all those games on turf."
- Tom Hamilton on Grady Sizemore batting DH instead of being in the outfield
"The way David Price has dominated the Indians over the years, a 4-run lead is mammoth."
- Tom Hamilton
"The Indians middle of the order just doesn't look the same without Travis Hafner."
- Tom Hamilton
"In Manny Acta's mind that's the magic number. You don't want a losing streak to go beyond 3."
- Tom Hamilton
"Well the Tribe has not had a 9th inning rally of 5 runs or more but...why not? It's been that kind of a season."
- Tom Hamilton in the beginning of the 9th
"Boy, this team has really excited the bay area. Friday night 16,800 show up. Yikes!"
- Tom Hamilton, slammin' the lack of Rays fans
"I don't think Matt LaPorta has to guess what's coming next from a guy who is pitching 96 miles per hour in a 5-0 game."
- Tom Hamilton
"With Joe Maddon, you could see anything. He's sometimes a mad scientist."
- Tom Hamilton
"We've lost Rosie. We'll get to him in the next inning. He's still convulsing over the cat."
"That's DJ Master Cat I think."
"You like that cat don't you? He'll probably be in our hotel lobby later. [...] The kitty has gone away now and this place has gone deafly silent."
- Tom Hamilton and Jim Rosenhaus on the Ray's 7th inning entertainment
"The biggest play of this inning is the double play Ben Zobrist didn't turn."
- Tom Hamilton
"Avril Lavigne. Come on...as a man with two daughters you should know who this is."
"I'm just asking the question. Can't I invoke my fifth amendment rights? [...] As a father of daughters you might be better off not knowing."
- Jim Rosenhaus and Tom Hamilton on Tampa's post-game entertainment
"Oh boy...my wife was listening. 'Ha ha ha, Rosie got you.' Our engineer Ralph can vouch...nothing wrong with daughters, I love the daughters! When boys have a problem with friends they punch them in the nose and that's it. With daughters, it's a whole soap opera. Ralph's daughters are glaring at me now. I'm done... [...] And for all the girls out there listening, we love our daughters just as we love our sons. And that's the end of the story."
- Tom Hamilton
"Tomorrow...is not Memorial Day in Canada."
- Tom Hamilton on the upcoming Blue Jays series
"At this level, if they know you're throwing mid-90s and the only pitch you can throw is a fastball, you're not lasting long."
- Tom Hamilton commenting on Frank Hermann's previous troubles
"He is a big human being. Six-eight, 295. And like so many people his size, he's got a gret nature about him. At that size if you wanted to be an angry man, look out."
- Tom Hamilton on Rays reliever Adam Russell
"For Masterson and Carmona they both have something in common so far. They both have had a team that really owned them."
- Tom Hamilton
"The Indians are not playing very good baseball right now. They're not hitting, they're not having quality pitching, and now their defense is opening up holes."
- Tom Hamilton
"Well I hope your barbecue is better then this ballgame. If not, it means somebody forgot to turn the meat."
- Tom Hamilton
"Boy this is why you think of baseball and you just shake your head sometimes. There are things like this that you just can't predict."
- Tom Hamilton
"If you haven't won a game in 3 years and have a 10-run lead, you deserve to finish it and be on the field to shake hands at the end."
- Tom Hamilton with regards to Jo-Jo Reyes
"It is no time to panic, Rosie. Every team that gets to the playoffs - with the exception of the 1995 Indians - has a rough spot."
- Tom Hamilton
"Whether you need to change the rules or not...smarter people than me will make that decision."
- Tom Hamilton regarding the current crashing-into-catchers situation
"...We haven't had anything to laugh about on this road trip."
"It's been a tough trip."
- Tom Hamilton and Jim Rosenhaus, cracking up
"Corey Patterson was sort of looking down at the turf saying 'I can't believe I just did that.'"
- Tom Hamilton
"I'm sure everyone in Toronto looked to see who the umpire was before they bought tickets for tonight's game. They saw it was Tim McClelland and that's why we have the biggest crowd for a Blue Jays game this year. They wanted to see McClelland NOT call balls and strikes."
- Tom Hamilton on one of his many McClelland rants
"I wonder if there's something going on between Santana and Talbot. You don't see Belcher run out like that. I mean, he ran."
- Tom Hamilton with regards to an interesting meeting at the mound
"I bet this pleases the Rangers...CJ Wilson's hobbies include travelling - ok - surfing, and auto racing."
- Tom Hamilton
"I'll say one thing about home plate umpire Tim Timmons. He's been consistent in one area - he's got hitters upset on both ball clubs."
- Tom Hamilton
"Tim Timmons better not need a ride to the airport. Not one of the players would give him one!"
- Tom Hamilton, several innings later
"Boy it's a weekend when the Indians have hit a ball hard, it is right at someone."
- Tom Hamilton
"Nelson Cruz...has had two home runs in this series. What he thinks every time he comes to the plate is 'Let's see how far I can hit this puppy.'"
- Tom Hamilton
"Good news, guys! Julie is 24 and still single! But you'd better not dawdle, as pretty as Julie is..."
- Tom Hamilton during the birthday greetings
"If Travis Hafner can hit for the cycle, aaaaanyone can."
- Tom Hamilton on Brantley's performance
"Rosie has reminded me to do a station identification for the first time in about a month. Stephanie Hagel has been barking at us about it for weeks."
- Tom Hamilton
"I tell you what Tom if you saw the way he started you wouldn't think he'd be here in the 8th inning."
- Mike Hegan on Scott Baker's performance
"They've set the table but nobody's clearing it!"
- Mike Hegan on Brantley and Asdrubal's performance
"For the Minnesota Twins, the 8th and 9th innings have become the Bermuda Triangle. It's where victories get lost."
- Tom Hamilton
"That's his second bat of the day. Good thing he's going home - might not have much lumber left for a longer road trip."
- Mike Hegan on Cuddyer's broken bat
"You said it, Tom. They needed a spark from somebody, somewhere, and that just did it."
- Mike Hegan on Hannahan's game-tying homer
"If you're wondering, the Indians have 4 walk-off wins."
- Tom Hamilton
"The way Carmona is pitching right now he is helping all of the Yankees out of their slumps."
- Tom Hamilton
"Carmona just served one up and said 'see how hard you can hit it.'"
- Tom Hamilton on Granderson's homer
"I don't blame Teixiera for being angry. That is bush league to throw that high after a home run."
- Tom Hamilton on Carmona hitting Mark Teixiera after giving up a home run
"That may be the most useless news story ever."
- Tom Hamilton on a story Rosenhaus read about the official scorer wanting to make sure he scored Jeter's 3000th hit correctly
"I don't even know if I can read some of these other headlines in this paper."
"Well you can, but I'll have another partner tomorrow afternoon."
- Tom Hamilton and Jim Rosenaus on The Daily Post
"Rosie's wife Carol is pregnant with their second child, which is great news. [...] I thought it was pregnant women who liked ice cream and pickles, but Rosie is going through ice cream here nobody's business. [...] You went through that ice cream like Sherman went through Georgia."
- Tom Hamilton
"If people could see what you destroyed before we went on the air tonight..."
- Jim Rosenhaus to Tom Hamilton in defense of his ice cream
"Those customs people at the air port are like 'Look, I don't want this job, I don't want to be here, so you are going to be miserable too.' You say 'hi' and they look at you like 'what did you mean by that?'"
- Tom Hamilton on going through customs
"We just heard that the grounds crew has been spotted on Long Island. I guess they are heading to the Hamptons for the weekend."
- Tom Hamilton on the rainy 7th inning
"There's a guy in the stands here who looks exactly like President Obama. Since they put him up on the big board, that guy hasn't bought his own beer all night."
- Tom Hamilton
"That just shows how your bullpen is in disarray, when you have to go to Mariano Rivera when down by 6 in the 9th."
- Tom Hamilton
"Former Indian Bartolo Colon has had a rejuvenation. The question is how did it come about...That's a topic for another time."
- Tom Hamilton on Colon's miraculous shoulder surgery that turned him from a guy in his early 30s pitching in the 80s to a guy in his late 30s pitching in the 90s.
"Carmona maintains he didn't try to hit him. New York maintains 'baloney!'"
- Tom Hamilton on Carmona hitting Mark Teixeira.
"Robinson Cano better drive the speed limit on the way home."
- Tom Hamilton after Cano hit a policeman with a foul ball
"Somehow some way he is going to make his way through it. He has made a miraculous recovery."
- Tom Hamilton after A-Rod came back in the game after being hit by Talbot. Rodriguez made a spectacular display of anguish "as if he was shot by a sniper." It was very Varejão.
"You only give up 3 runs against the Yankees, it feels like you should win."
- Tom Hamilton
"If you're in the upper deck you are a long way from the action."
"And if you're in the lower seats you're either a multi-millionaire or you snuck in."
- Jim Rosenhaus and Tom Hamilton
"C.B. Bucknor is one of the nicest men, but the worst umpire."
- Tom Hamilton
"Jack Nicholson made that movie before he got courtside seats to the LA Lakers. But that movie helped him get those seats."
- Tom Hamilton explaining One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest for the youngsters. The movie came up because apparently Yankee pitcher Freddie Garcia looks like the character Chief and carries that nickname.
"You can eat all the sushi you want but you still have to age. A lot of players are eating sushi like it's the fountain of youth. [...] I'm not saying sushi is bad, just give me some Lake Erie perch, fried up."
- Tom Hamilton
"The Indians have pretty much let everybody back in to the [penant] race."
- Tom Hamilton
"[Umpire] Mike Muchlinski tells him 'look that's not going to be ball 3 after you just took a bunt like that.'"
- Tom Hamilton
"Well they just made an announcement here at Yankee Stadium that should clear some of the park. Eduardo Nunez is coming in to bat and play short for Derek Jeter."
- Tom Hamilton
"Boy, Jack Hannahan has played Gold Glove third base all season long."
- Tom Hamilton
"This might be one of those games where if you're going to win you've got to win one to nothing."
- Tom Hamilton
"The Indians looking to get out of New York with a 1-run win or better, and hoping that the Tigers and Tampa Bay play 23 innings."
- Tom Hamilton
"So the Indians defensively are letting down Justin Masterson."
- Tom Hamilton
"A fan somehow reached up and snagged that foul ball. That's the kind of defense the Indians are looking for."
- Tom Hamilton
"Right now the way he [Verlander] looks, I'd be shocked if the Indians got a hit. Nothing against the Indians offense but this kid would be no-hitting anybody tonight."
- Tom Hamilton
"I wonder how many people in the Motor City are trying to get down here to get a ticket tonight. History is in the making."
- Tom Hamilton
"Catcher Alex Avila goes to the mound and says to Penny 'Look you've got three pitches, which one are you going to throw?'"
- Jim Rosenhaus
"You get the feeling the Indians are going to get to Brad Penny tonight."
- Tom Hamilton
"He realized it wasn't the beard, it was him."
"Shaved it off and hit a home run!"
- Tom Hamilton and Mike Hegan on Brennan Boesch's ex-beard
"If Fausto Carmona can throw strikes, Ordonez cannot hit them."
- Tom Hamilton
"I'll tell you what, he takes after mama's side of the family. Because his dad was a big strapping lineman."
- Tom Hamilton on Tiger relief pitcher Daniel Schlerech
"He'd have to be Carlton Fisk to get that one. Or maybe Dirk Nowitzki."
- Mike Hegan on a high wild pitch
"This guy you just hold your breath every time he comes to the plate."
- Tom Hamilton on Miguel Cabrera (no relation)
"He coulda used a relay man there. Hand him a baton...somebody else to go the other 35 feet."
- Mike Hegan on Miguel Cabrera's slowness out of the box
"I said to Tony [Sipp] the other day, how did Clemson do in the post season? 'Don't know, don't care.'"
- Tom Hamilton on Tony Sipp's Clemson coach telling him he'll never make it in the pros
"Sometimes you win, sometimes you lose. And Charlie's got the blues."
"[...] By the way, I didn't ignore that. I had something deep to say and now I've lost it..."
- Tom Hamilton cracking up Mike Hegan
"The Indians get a little-league home run and lead one to nothing."
- Tom Hamilton
"One - where was Boesch going? And second - that's a dangerous play! [...] It's a routine first inning, folks..."
- Tom Hamilton on Asdrubal's double play to end the first inning
"Wow...Brennan Boesch runs like he's 50!"
- Tom Hamilton on Boesch missing a ball in the outfield in the 3rd
"Some of the umpires that paid to get in today are not happy with that call. They always put them in the good seats behind the plate, too."
- Jim Rosenhaus
"One thing to say about Jose Valverde...he is not on any kind of a fruit diet."
- Tom Hamilton on the Tigers' 6'4" 255# closer
"Valverde's body language would give you the idea that the last place in the world he wants to be is Comerica Park."
- Tom Hamilton
"Right now he's the Dominican's version of Burl Ives. Throws a little harder tho."
- Tom Hamilton on Valverde's goatee
"The Indians as a team hitting .500 with the bases loaded."
- Jim Rosenhaus
"I called it the Yake. Yacobs field, that's how I remember it."
- Carlos Baerga
"He has my name so that is why he had to hit a home run today."
- Carlos Baerga on Carlos Santana's home run
"Michael Brantley...stay with it! He's hitting it as hard as he can but has nothing to show for it so far."
- Jim Rosenhaus
"I used to have to write in 'Mike Hegan' 300 times each season."
"I got 301 votes. Three-hundred from you and one from my wife."
- Jim Rosenhaus and Mike Hegan on All-Star voting
"Wood putting the drama back in to the intentional walk."
- Jim Rosenhaus on Tim Wood's sort of wild intentional balls
"All the ingredients that made this team so successful earlier in the season were on display tonight."
- Jim Rosenhaus
"The final count was over 60,000 dogs last night. [...] Sales of antacid in the Cleveland area were high today."
- Jim Rosenhaus on Friday's Dollar Dog Night
"Hammy is our big toe."
- Jim Rosenhaus on Tom Hamilton's absence
"Nobody can hit that breaking ball, Mike."
"Not just this ball club, nobody period."
- Jim Rosenhaus and Mike Hegan on Carrasco's breaking ball
"How many hitters would have watched it and not gotten to 3rd base?"
- Jim Rosenhaus on Grady's home-run-turned-triple
"The most confused guy in the ballpark right now is Juan Nicasio."
- Mike Hegan on Santana's homer in the 4th
"He was cruising along and ran into a little bit of trouble, then BANG the roof caved in on him."
- Mike Hegan on Fausto's departure
"Florida has a new manager, who's an old manager. [...] Jack McKeon, the first year he managed in the big leagues, President Nixon was going through the Watergate scandal."
- Tom Hamilton on the hiring of interim manager Jack McKeon in Florida
"Manny Acta just loves the way Michael Brantley goes about his business."
- Tom Hamilton
"I have no idea what was wrong with it...wait, I do know. There was nothing wrong with it. [...] So if it's down the middle of the plate, it's a ball to Todd Helton."
- Tom Hamilton hating on umpire Gerry Davis
"Pronkville is begging for a souvenir."
- Tom Hamilton
"People listen to these games and they actually believe you guys! I pay for that in the offseason!"
- Jim Rosenhaus taking Mike Hegan to task for suggesting that he was wearing pink high heels
"Chacin is walking around the mound thinking to himself 'Why can't I throw strikes over the corners of the plate?'"
- Tom Hamilton on Chacin's multiple walks
"Those 'All You Can Eat Seats' ... great time to go to the ballpark and then get a physical the next day."
- Tom Hamilton
"The way the wind is blowing now, it'll be easier to rally from behind."
- Tom Hamilton puts a positive spin on the impending storm
"They put a 'no doubles' defense on at Coors Field and doubles will be dropping in everywhere."
- Tom Hamilton
"I asked Orlando Cabrera how he liked playing third base, and he just shook his head."
- Tom Hamilton
"He either caught a spike or he simply had a brain cramp."
- Tom Hamilton on Hammel's balk
"He twisted so hard he almost spun into the ground!"
- Mike Hegan on Hafner's home run swing
"A year ago, the Indians were 13.5 games out of first. And 20 games below .500. What a turnaround!"
- Tom Hamilton
"And the Tribe bullpen is still shutting them down. What else is new?"
- Tom Hamilton after the top of the 8th
"Boy, Choo hit a 2-iron that just didn't get high enough!"
- Tom Hamilton
"Carrasco was outmatched from the moment he stepped in to the batter's box."
- Tom Hamilton on Carrasco's first at-bat
"Folks if you need to go do something, you can go do it now because [Carrasco] isn't going to help himself."
"He swung at one that was over his head last time I think."
- Tom Hamilton and Jim Rosenhaus on Carrasco's second at-bat
"Yeah but when you're Kung-Fu Panda, you don't just throw to first to end a game you have to put a little style in it."
- Tom Hamilton admiring Pablo Sandoval's nickname
"If you're looking for Jimmy Hoffa you might want to look in Brian Wilson's beard. [...] How much shoe polish does it take to dye that thing jet black?"
"Who would have thought the Abe Lincoln look would be in vogue?"
- Tom Hamilton and Jim Rosenhaus on Giants pitcher Brian Wilson's beard
"He charged the slow chopper and did everything but kick it into the seats."
- Tom Hamilton on Santana's second error in the 6th inning
"You play the world champions in their park, you can't beat yourself. And that's what the Indians are doing here."
- Tom Hamilton
"No matter what happens this inning, it just has not been a very good weekend. [...] They're just not doing the little things and the little things are what got them to 30 and 15."
- Tom Hamilton
"It's supposed to be a high of 111 degrees [in Arizona]. But, the natives will tell you 'It's a dry heat.' Satan will tell you Hell is a dry heat!"
"An oven is dry heat but you don't put your head in there!"
"Good thing we're indoors, which the entire state of Arizona is indoors."
- Tom Hamilton and Jim Rosenhaus on the weather in Arizona
"If one of those sail boats goes over, since we're high up here is it our job to call the Coast Guard?"
- Jim Rosenhaus
"Travis Buck has racked up the frequent flyer miles going between home and Columbus."
- Tom Hamilton
"And how 'bout the kid?"
- Tom Hamilton on Lonnie Chisenhall
"My friend went golfing today, his tee-time was 2:30. Since nobody is outside golfing since it's so darned hot, it was $7 to tee off at 2:30 on a nice course!"
- Tom Hamilton can't believe how hot it is in Arizona
"From the outside it looks like an airplane hangar. You'd never know it was a baseball stadium from the outside."
- Tom Hamilton on Chase Field
"They're all down his arms, coming up his neck. He's missing the Mike Tyson face tattoo but that's about it...I didn't go any further than that. That's taking reporting a little too far."
- Jim Rosenhaus on Ryan Roberts' tattoos
"Based on how they are ordering things down below, the staff Christmas party is OFF. The budget has been blown."
- Tom Hamilton on the Indians' back office party downstairs
"He doesn't look comfortable against the submarine style pitching of Joe Smith. Most right-handers don't feel comfortable."
- Tom Hamilton on Justin Upton
"Tony Sipp is not paying any attention to the baserunner. You just can't do that in a tie game in the 9th!"
- Tom Hamilton
"We're in the desert! If you don't believe me, the temperature is 113 degrees and the humidity is 18 percent."
- Tom Hamilton
"Sorry Ryan Roberts, you're not that good. Carlos Carrasco is not trying to hit you. Unless Rosie told you to, because of all the tattoos, which seem to really bother [Rosenhause] this series."
- Tom Hamilton
"That's a little play, that doesn't end up in the box score...but just a little slide prevented a double play. [...] Now you've got runners at the corners with one out."
- Tom Hamilton on Austin Kearns' baserunning in the 3rd
"The park is air-conditioned and your car is air-conditioned, but people don't want to make the walk from the car to the ballpark in this heat."
- Jim Rosenhaus on the struggle to get people to come to day games in Arizona
"You come to this balllpark and you'd better score runs. You're not going to see many 1-0 games in this ballpark."
- Tom Hamilton
"Justin Masteron has a lead!"
- Tom Hamilton, after just 2 innings
"Can you imagine Brett Favre uncorking a throw from short?"
- Tom Hamilton talking about Favre's amature baseball career
"Dusty [Baker] thought 'if that idiot on the radio thought of it, why didn't I think of it two innings ago?'"
- Tom Hamilton noticing that the Reds got someone warming up as soon as he mentioned it
"Does anybody ever get hurt when they're in a slump?"
- Tom Hamilton on the exit of the hot-hitting Travis Buck
"Boy, it's hard to think of a third baseman right now who has a stronger throwing arm than Lonnie Chisenhall."
- Tom Hamilton
"If the Indians are in town, Brandon Phillips is going to have a big weekend. He just absolutely TORTURES the Indians. It's almost as if he wants to make sure the Indians never forget they let him get away."
- Tom Hamilton
"We're going to get to see the Cuban Missle, Aroldis Chapman. He can throw 100 miles an hour, but there's a chance he'll also throw it up here to our broadcast booth."
- Tom Hamilton Aroldis Chapman's control
"Two hours for Rowland, but an hour and twenty minutes for Rosie."
"You gotta make up your mind. I've been accused of driving slowly before, too."
- Tom Hamilton on driving from Cincinnatti to Indianapolis
"All Drew Stubbs is trying to do right now is padding his stolen base total. You know what's going to happen to Drew Stubbs this weekend? He's going to get drilled."
- Tom Hamilton does not like you trying to steal when we've given up trying to throw you out
"What the remaining Reds fans are saying now is that the fireworks better be phenomenal. Because the game got ugly quick for Reds fans."
- Tom Hamilton
"This is why having American League teams have to do this is idiotic. Having the pitchers bat, all that is going to happen is your pitcher gets hurt."
- Tom Hamilton DOES NOT LIKE when AL teams have to bat their pitcher
"In most years in the American league if you have an ERA under 4.0 you're leading the league."
- Tom Hamilton on the Indians' team ERA of 3.65
"The bats have come alive since they left San Francisco!"
- Tom Hamilton
"There's no question that National League lineups in no way compare to the American League. Part of it is the DH but there's just not good hitting in the National League."
- Tom Hamilton
"For nine days I twiddled my thumbs until the 7th inning then hoped I got an at-bat."
- Travis Hafner to Tom Hamilton
"They don't like the balls and strikes being called, but get used to it that's what he did in the first inning! [...] One thing about the Yankees - they never believe that a call should go against them."
- Tom Hamilton on a dust-up between the Yankees catcher and the home plate umpire
"I don't think anyone in the American League is sorry to see [pitchers batting] go."
"You know who will miss it? Josh Tomlin. He got some great hits!"
- Mike Hegan and Jim Rosenhaus on pitchers batting
"CC Sabathia already said 'I'm going to the Bahamas, don't call.'"
- Tom Hamilton on the All Star Game picks
"The last time these teams faced each other on the 4th of July was here, 5 years ago, and the Indians won 19-1! Tonight, nothing but goose eggs!"
- Tom Hamilton
"His numbers have started to drop a little with age. And a lack of vitamins."
- Tom Hamilton does not like A-Rod taking "vitamins" (HE MEANS STEROIDS)
"Well it had to have hit something or Teixeira would have caught it. He catches everything!"
- Tom Hamilton on a mysterious bounce in the 7th
"How about...you get your first home run on the 4th of July against the New York Yankees, and your second hit off of AJ Burnett?"
- Tom Hamilton on Kearns' homer
"Vinnie Pestano was 10 during Derek Jeter's rookie year."
- Tom Hamilton
"It doesn't matter how the weather is at home, how the wind is blowing. It's blowing in tonight and they just hit two more homers at home! We all know how miserable the spring was in Cleveland yet the Indians have now hit 53 home runs at home, 24 on the road."
- Tom Hamilton
"This is kind of a micrcosm of this season. This ballclub does not rely on one guy."
- Tom Hamilton
"That was vintage Sizemore!"
- Jim Rosenhaus after Grady's awesome catch in the 5th
"The problem with a 2-0 lead...if you're Manny Acta you hold your breath every time a Yankee comes to the plate with a man on."
- Tom Hamilton
"The Indians have had so many opportunities, they need to cash in here or rue the day."
- Tom Hamilton on having the bases loaded
"Well you don't have to guess where Boone Logan is from. Texas. With a name like that he's not from North Dakota."
- Tom Hamilton
"With bases loaded and less than 2 outs they're hitting .613 as a team."
- Tom Hamilton, on the Indians
"I don't think Villanueva is going to invite Dana DeMuth for a late-night dinner."
- Tom Hamilton on the home-plate umpire's tight strike zone
"They've got a shift on for Hafner. My goodness, there is a second baseman in right field, about 40 feet."
- Tom Hamilton
"The Indians have the makings of a pretty good rec league basketball team now with [McAllister], Masterson...Carlos Carrasco is a big boy too, maybe on point."
- Jim Rosenhaus
"You know, 94 pitches here in the big leagues, the way he had to work so hard, is like 120 pitches down in Columbus."
- Mike Hegan on McAllister's pitch count
"This game has had the pace of the old tortise and the hare race. [...] As we've said before, some 4 hour games are too short and some 3 hour games are too long. This game is too long."
- Mike Hegan after 3 hours
"Encarnacion jumps up in the air and he's not happy. But he's got to get in line, Dana DeMuth has 15 other people unhappy with his calls tonight."
- Tom Hamilton after Encarnacion strikes out
"If the Indians don't win this game, they have only themselves to blame."
- Tom Hamilton
"You don't want to be down 3 runs but if you have to be down 3 runs this is the situation you want to face."
- Mike Hegan with Hafner up and the bases loaded
"A night of utter frustration ends with one of the best 9th innings ever at Progressive Field."
- Tom Hamilton
"Basically when you see what we saw last night from Travis Hafner, it's like seeing a perfect game, frequency-wise."
- Tom Hamilton
"So much for the Indians being able to capitalize off the momentum of last night's comeback."
- Tom Hamilton
"You wonder how many starts he's going to get before the Indians go to triple-A."
- Tom Hamilton on Mitch Talbot
"Try to figure out this one. Jo-Jo Reyes goes three years without a win, and he's trying to beat them for the second time this year."
- Tom Hamilton
"Well the good news for the Indians is that they have Josh Tomlin tomorrow."
- Tom Hamilton
"You can't go into the 9th inning down 5 or 6 runs thinking 'Well, we'll get 'em, just like last night.'"
- Tom Hamilton
"All the time, Orlando Cabrera seems to be in the middle of it."
- Tom Hamilton on Orlando at bat as the tying run
"Boy that's what happens when you have a home plate umpire who acts like he's never called balls and strikes before."
- Tom Hamilton is not amused
"I can't think of anyone else who's given up 9 this year..."
"Oh, Fausto. He gave up 10."
"[Laughing] Well, you know, I was trying to come up with 9 not 10..."
"We weren't laughing that day were we?"
- Tom Hamilton and Mike Hegan on Charlie Furbush giving up 9 runs today
"There is something about watching the All Star game and seeing your club first in the standings."
- Tom Hamilton
"The Indians have preached and preached both to Carmona and Carrasco - when you're in trouble quit trying to trick hitters."
- Tom Hamilton
"It almost looks like some guys are on the All Star break too soon."
- Tom Hamilton
"John Farrel feels Jose Bautista has done enough damage for the weekend."
- Tom Hamilton on Bautista leaving the game
"He's like Secretariat right now."
- Tom Hamilton on Bautista leading in homers by so many
"A year ago at this time, the Cleveland Indians were 20 games under .500 and 15 games out of first. This has not been a good weekend but look at the first half as a whole."
- Tom Hamilton
"The Indians may be the only playoff contender that doesn't need bullpen help."
- Tom Hamilton
"If you didn't know better, based on the weather and the score, the Browns are making a comeback against the Bears!"
- Tom Hamilton
"Bob Uecker says that [Chicago pitcher] Chris Sale is so thin that you can see his wallet from the front."
- Tom Hamilton
"As hot as the White Sox have been so far, that is how good Masterson is pitching today."
- Tom Hamilton
"It wasn't easy but Chris Perez notches save number one here in 2011. And the Red Sox are winless after four."
- Tom Hamilton
"There's no love lost between the Koreans and the Japanese. [...] And for the first time ever, Daisuke Matsuzaka has given up a run at the corner of Carnegie and Ontario."
- Tom Hamilton (talking about the national baseball teams not the nations)
"How good are one dollar hot dogs? Even Buck Showalter doesn't have anything bad to say about Dollar Dog Night."
- Tom Hamilton
"I'm not sure if it's the time change or what but I just looked at the clock and we're one hour ahead of where we were last night."
- Mike Hegan (commenting on the length of last night's game)
"If that restaurant doesn't have windows, someone has a large crouton in their salad."
- Tom Hamilton, regarding Hafner's homer off the face of the restaurant at Safeco Field.
"...thank you Milton."
- Tom Hamilton in response to Milton Bradley's error which allowed an un-earned run
"That's why your shortstop is the cutoff man. He's not out there to WAVE at Milton Bradley, you're supposed to throw to him. Oh well..."
- Tom Hamilton, still milling over Milton's error
"The umpires are all off-season dentists, and they tell him he's fine, put the mask back on."
- Tom Hamilton, NOT in response to Milton Bradley, but in response to a delay of game while one of the umpires asks the other umpires about his tooth
"[Milton Bradley] has plugged his ears with cotton. Good lord."
- Tom Hamilton
"If Bradley strikes out here, he'll need more than cotton in his ears."
- Tom Hamilton
"If I told you the Indians were 16-12 in the month of April, you'd probably say 'Oh, ok.' But if your team goes 4 over .500 every month of the season, suddenly you're 24 games over .500 by the end of the season."
- Tom Hamilton
"Cabrera grabs the ball and throws to...the other Cabrera..."
- Tom Hamilton
"Tim McClellan likes to be Santa Claus and not tell anyone what's in the present. Nobody in the ballpark - players, fans - has any idea what the call is until he waves his finger."
- Tom Hamilton
"Only in Disney Land can a monkey become everybody's favorite pet."
- Tom Hamilton, talking about the Rally Monkey. Yeah, that is a thing.
"Looking at the next batters, it's the Angels' 3, 4 and 5 hitters. So if you're going to finish off the Angels, you're going to earn it!"
- Tom Hamilton
"Never thought I'd come to Anaheim and there would be Fleece Blanket Night"
- Tom Hamilton
"Fausto Carmona - he's pitched gallantly tonight. Dan Heran has simply pitched better."
- Tom Hamilton
"What Kendrick got there is called a Little League home run."
- Tom Hamilton in response to Anaheim's Kendrick scoring on an error after hitting a double.
"Travis Hafner with a deep drive to right center. Can mother nature knock it down? No! Travis Hafner..into the teeth of the wind has his third home run! [...] And Pronk is back!"
- The Poetic Tom Hamilton
"Today's birthday wishes go to Helen Molnar. Ninety-four years young. Her actual birthday is this coming Tuesday, but she plays bingo on weeknights and she won't be home. Hey, nothing like a good game of bingo! [...] Hope it's a good night at the bingo parlor, Helen!
- Tom Hamilton
"Didn't realize it was 'steal a t-shirt' night at Great American Ball Park."
- Tom Hamilton's final words after his half-inning rant about Reds pitcher Mike Leake getting arrested for shoplifting six t-shirts
"With Sizemore at first and Asdrubal Cabrera at the plate, there isn't much you can't do."
- Tom Hamilton
"It's a two run [10th] inning and the fans are flocking to the parking lot."
- Tom Hamilton
"I've never seen that before! It literally bounced off the ground and hit Cabrera. Can this game get any wackier?!"
- Tom Hamilton (the game wasn't particularly wacky...I think he's been on the road too long)
"Grady Sizemore showing why he's a Gold-glover, and why this ballclub is a contender."
- Tom Hamilton
"If you talk to the Royals they are happy as heck that Zach Greinke is gone from Kansas City. He was a bit of a Negative Nellie in the clubhouse..."
- Tom Hamilton
"They got soft here in Minneapolis once they got the Metrodome. They didn't have to fight the blizzards to watch the Vikings at old Metropolitain Stadium. Nobody got softer than our engineer, Wayne."
- Tom Hamilton
"One thing stays consistent - the Indians can't get a left-handed hitter out."
- Tom Hamilton
"'Do you believe in miracles?' as Al Michaels once said. The Indians need one here."
- Tom Hamilton
"It's only a matter of time before Minnesota wakes up, and starts to play winning baseball. You just don't want to be the team that gets them going."
- Tom Hamilton
"Ohio State has 4000 people to see the band play before the game."
- Tom Hamilton, commenting on the sorry state of Minnesota Gophers football
"The tag is on Morneau...AND HE IS OUT BY EIGHT FEET! ... So Choo retires more hitters in the third than Carrasco did."
- Tom Hamilton at the end of the third inning
"It's amazing how many people that write for a living can't come up with an original thought. How can you all be writing about the same thing....nobody was writing it a year ago."
- Tom Hamilton's reaction to all of the recent stories that Joe Mauer should be moved from catching
"Gomez needs to pitch well, because if he doesn't there's a guy named Alex White knocking on the door."
- Tom Hamilton
"Cabrera hits one by Ka'aihue at first, who has the range of a statue."
- Tom Hamilton
"If he gets hot - LOOK OUT!"
- Tom Hamilton re: Shin-Soo Choo
"Justin Masterson has a good chance to be 5-0 in about a half hour."
- Tom Hamilton
"HOW ABOUT THAT?! Bases loaded, nobody out and Pestano takes care of the 4- 5- and 6-batters for the Royals!"
- Tom Hamilton
"Folks, if you don't like Shelley Duncan, take a good look in the mirror. The problem will be staring back at you."
- Tom Hamilton
"Is it that hard to let everyone know what the call is? Is his right arm that heavy?"
- Tom Hamilton
"Now, what in the world...why, in the month of April, should a team from the west coast play a team from Florida in a dome? It's not that hard to make the schedule. It's idiotic."
- Tom Hamilton
"Manny Acta's faith never has waivered on Santana. And never has a manager's faith had such a big return."
- Tom Hamilton
"There isn't a prettier ballpark than this one when it fills up like it did tonight. There's a new energy at the corner of Carnagie and Ontario."
- Tom Hamilton
"Looking at his jersey, he's got letters starting at his waist, going up and ending again at his waist."
- Tom Hamilton, commenting on Al Alburquerque
"He only weighs about a hundred pounds. [...] If his name was Saltalamacchia it would go all the way around his number. He only needs a few more letters."
- Mike Hegan's take on Alburquerque's name
"You're saying 'Why not go to Everett?' and it's because Jack Hannahan, against left handed pitching this year, is hitting .529."
- Tom Hamilton
"Jim Leyland, who normally has a cigarette going, has smoke coming out of his ears."
- Tom Hamilton on Brennan Boesch's first-pitch popup with a man at second in the 13th inning.
"...Unfortunately, April is over."
- Tom Hamilton
"You can buy a baseball team when you record a song like 'Rudoplh the Red Nosed Reindeer'. [...] Just think, every time your kids sing 'Rudolph' Gene Autrey is making money."
- Tom Hamilton regarding Gene Autrey's ownership of the Angels
"Proof again that a Buckeye is always tougher than a Gaucho. What is a Gaucho, Tony? It's sort of a horse? A Spanish horseman. Well, how many Spanish horsemen can play volleyball?"
- Tom Hamilton regarding the OSU men's volleyball winning the national championships over USC Santa Barbara
"Bobby Abreau is going to finish his career at some point...he's 37...and he's going to have one of the greatest careers that nobody's ever talked about."
- Tom Hamilton
"Former Indian Izturas went with Ryan Church to Houston for Scott Stewart. The only thing I can remember about Scott Stewart is that nobody ate more Fudgecicles in the history of the Indians franchise and was less productive than Scott Stewart."
"Scott Stewart was a peacock for the bullpen and he found himself in triple-A awfully quick."
"Were there a lot of Fudgecicles in Buffalo, Rosie?"
"I didn't want to go there, but there was a shortstop gone to Montreal and the Bisons added a relief pitcher who couldn't get anyone out at that level either."
"And it was never his fault."
- Tom Hamilton and Jim Rosenhaus fondly remembering Scott Stewart
"Hey, there's a ball the Angels didn't get! That might be the first one in two games that they didn't make a sensational play on."
- Tom Hamilton on Santana's 4th inning double
"Oh my, what a huge hit for Choo. And it might be be the first time on this road trip that he's been able to take a deep breath and relax. And I can't believe how many Indians fans are here!"
"Tom, I think in addition to Indians fans, I think there's Choo fans."
"You're right, Rosie. Especially out west, the Korean delegation."
"When he came to the plate there was a lot of Choo-ing like at home."
- Tom Hamilton on Choo's 2-run double and the resulting wave of "CHOOOOOO!"
"Well if you like numbers, Jared Weaver in his last three starts against the Indians had given up one run, in three starts. So this again tells you how legitimate this ball club is, Rosie. They're doing it against good pitching they're not just doing it against meatballers."
- Tom Hamilton
"We've got the Angels television feed up here, and when the Angels strike out they don't replay it."
"It's like it never happened."
"Well, we are around the corner from Disneyland."
- Tom Hamilton and Jim Rosenhaus
"You don't see many clubs play a home game on Sunday at 12:35. [...] I guess nobody goes to church out here. Except our engineer Tony!"
- Tom Hamilton
"How many times have we said 'if the Indians could juuuust have a good start to the season...'? I think 18 and 8 is a great start!"
- Tom Hamilton
"I don't know how people can stick their hands out for a ball like that. You might get a free baseball but you'll spend thousands at the orthopedic surgeon to get your fingers re-attached."
- Tom Hamilton regarding a laser Santana foul ball
"A fan in the suites reached out and made a one-handed grab. Everyone is playing defense today at Progressive Field! The good news is that he didn't spill any of his diet Pepsi. The fans below him appreciate it."
- Tom Hamilton
"Will Rhymes gave it a ride, except it was Will Rhymes and not Miguel Cabrera so it's still 5-3."
- Tom Hamilton
"Right there is an example of an out that is simply a foul ball in any other ball park in the major leagues."
- Tom Hamilton
"The chance of the A's signing Adrian Beltre this summer was the same as Rosie and I sprouting wings and flying back to our hotel."
- Tom Hamilton
"Boy, the outfield couldn't play any deeper unless they were sitting on the wall."
- Tom Hamilton
"'Enjoy the journey'...that's the motto Stephanie Hagel has driven in to those of us who work here. 'Don't worry about whether or not we make it on the air or not, just enjoy the journey and I'll take care of the rest."
"Would you make that statement if it wasn't after midnight back home?"
"Oh sure, I'm livin' on the edge."
- Tom Hamilton and Jim Rosenhaus
"This would be a great way to start one of the ruggedest...that's not even a word...before we have every English teacher writing us...this would be a great way to start one of the most rugged road trips in baseball this year."
- Tom Hamilton
"Well if it weren't for David DeJesus, Josh Tomlin is having a perfect game. Sounds stupid, but he gave up a solo home run and got the next 8 batters out..."
- Tom Hamilton
"Let's hope that the lack of closer experience backfires on Balfour."
- Tom Hamilton
"I don't mean to laugh Rosie...but he's not 6 feet. If you're listed at 6 feet, you're 5'10". With every pitch, it looks like his arm is going to disconnect from his body, so you can see why he has command problems."
- Tom Hamilton on Tyler Chatwood
"Chatwood looks like he's 12 years old, and 6 feet is being generous."
- Jim Rosenhaus
"Choo proving that even though he's not swinging the bat so well right now, he's still a deadly weapon with that arm."
- Tom Hamilton
"Sometimes, [playing in your hometown] can be a hassle. People forget that you're here to work, this is not a vacation."
- Tom Hamilton regarding Vinnie Pestano pitching in his hometown of Anaheim
"Boy the Indians have hit some screamers tonight, but right at people."
- Tom Hamilton
"It's playing like the Grand Canyon out here tonight."
- Tom Hamilton regarding the hard-hit fly balls that go nowhere
"Choo with a throw on the fly to home. Aybar would have been out by a mile."
- Tom Hamilton
"The Indians are third in the league in pitching, which sort of gets lots. As tough as the pitching has been for the Indians to face, the same is true for the Angels and Oakland. Runs have been at a premium for both the Indians and their opposition."
- Tom Hamilton
"Marson says he got his hand in there. [Umpire] Doug Eddings says 'I didn't see it that way.'"
- Tom Hamilton
"[Stephanie Hagel] is pushing the Mother's Day envelope, she wants us to do a legal ID. We say all these nice things about Stephanie and she drops the FCC in our lap."
- Tom Hamilton
"It's amazing...when you're having a good year and you've got a winning record...whether or not it's a perception or reality, it sure seems like you get more calls in your favor than when you're having a bad year."
- Tom Hamilton ruminating on a questionable call in the 6th
"I shouldn't shortchange Milton Bradley. He'll be back next weekend too. Now, how long he stays in the game remains to be seen. He's been booted out of at least two games here recently for arguing balls and strikes. We'll also see if he's still wearing earplugs. He's been wearing earplugs at every home game in Seattle. At a HOME ballgame! That ought to be a promotion for the Indians. Have a contest, see who can have the best histrionics to an actor who's an umpire, and get thrown out, and win the best seats in the house."
- Tom Hamilton on the upcoming Mariners series and the return of his favorite player
"Boy does this tell you everything you need to know about this ball club. They just refuse to believe they're ever beaten. And if you talk to Manny Acta, the coaches, any of the players, they'll tell you the same thing. This ballclub always feels like it's going to find a way to win. And talk is cheap - the bottom line is they've gone out and done it this year. That's why they believe it's so that they're going to find ways to win."
- Tom Hamilton after Grady and Asdrubal's back-to-back doubles in the 9th
"Zobrist would like to argue with home plate umpire Dale Scott. Good luck."
- Tom Hamilton
"Well, he didn't go to Lafayette. We say that in jest because Rosie is a graduate of Lafayette. It took him 8 years to get his undergraduate degree."
- Tom Hamilton
"In baseball, the regular season means something, not like in the NBA or the NHL. Not when you have 16 teams in the playoffs."
- Tom Hamilton
"Usually when that happens you're not going to win. But with the kind of season this team is having, who knows."
- Tom Hamilton, regarding the unusually high number of men left in scoring position by the Indians
"The last thing you want is Choo bunting. He can with it with one swing of the bat."
- Tom Hamilton
"It looks to the hitter that there are ten guys in the infield and nobody in the outfield. But you have to hit it to the outfield, that's the key."
- Tom Hamilton on "double play depth"
"Michael, it was a slider! Take one for the team!"
- Mike Hegan on Brantley moving out of the way of a pitch with the bases loaded
"It's literally a walk-off win!"
- Tom Hamilton
"I don't mean to be a Debbie Downer, Fred Griffith, but you got the wrong time to get the Bedford Nissan Grand Slam Payoff. Not with David Price on the mound."
- Tom Hamilton
"Being 5 runs down against David Price, it might as well be 15 runs."
- Tom Hamilton
"If you get hit in the back with one of Price's pitches, you might not take another breath until midnight."
- Tom Hamilton
"It had to come to an end, and if it had to come to an end you'd think it would be against a guy like David Price."
- Tom Hamilton
"Doug Jones used to do that, former Indians pitcher. Slow, slower and slowest."
- Mike Hegan
"...in downtown You Gotta Be Sh*ttin' Me..."
- Tom Bodet in a new Motel 6 commercial
"OUT AT SECOND IS CABRERA! How in the world can you get picked off at second down 5 to 3?!"
- Tom Hamilton shares his disappointment with Orlando Cabrera
"...then again, Palmeiro didn't do anything he just took somebody else's vitamin shot. There's a story to that but we all have families to feed."
- Tom Hamilton regarding Rafael Palmeiro's alleged steroids use
"Albert Pujols has made more news for hugging Joe Strauss than for swinging his bat."
- Tom Hamilton regarding recent Albert Pujols news
"As-lando Cabrera has his second double of the day..."
- Tom Hamilton's quick save
"He sure got comfortable in a hurry!"
- Tom Hamilton's comment on Choo's first-inning homer, after commenting that Choo does not look comfortable at the plate
"Jack Hannahan could not get a hit the rest of the year and he'd still be worth it."
- Tom Hamilton on Hannahan's performance at third base
"Suzuki is surprised that anyone would ever call a strike on him. He's four feet out of the batter's box, I don't know how he would know."
- Tom Hamilton
"Shall he ever come to the will-call window, Tony Sipp will not be leaving tickets."
- Tom Hamilton on Sipp's college coach who told him he'd never make it in the big leagues
"This is the kind of game that makes you think there's something special going on in 2011."
- Tom Hamilton
"That may have been the longest trip to the mound ever."
- Jim Rosenhaus after Tom Hamilton took advantage of some down time to explain how Rosie's induction into the Buffalo Bisons Hall of Fame is starting to affect their jobs
"Not only have the horses left the barn, the barn has burned to the ground."
- Tom Hamilton on the 10-run inning
"You know you've had quite a night offensively when your number eight man in the batting order has been to the plate 6 times. It's like a softball game."
- Tom Hamilton
"[Asdrubal] Cabrera is starting to make either jump throws or throws-off-balance better than any player in the league."
- Tom Hamilton
"Treanor dancing off the bag there. Why, I don't know. It's sometimes more distracting for the hitter than anything."
- Tom Hamilton
"And Matt Treanor gets picked off at second for the final out of the seventh with his club down five! Thank you, thank you, thank you!"
- Tom Hamilton, moments later
"He'd be a bad poker player wouldn't he? He's out there wearing his emotions on his sleeve when he doesn't have that good command."
"Yeah he's an adrenaline guy. If he were a poker player right now Rosie he might throw the deck of cards back at the dealer."
- Jim Rosenhaus and Tom Hamilton on Chris Perez's not-so-awesome 9th
"Carmona was too amped up for his Opening Day assignment. Tried to throw the ball 200 miles per hour."
- Tom Hamilton
"Paul Konerko continues to terrorize Carmona."
- Tom Hamilton
"Travis is going to be out...they say 3 to 4 weeks. But when you say 3 to 4 weeks with an oblique, count on 6 weeks."
- Tom Hamilton
"The only thing missing from this postcard is Harrison Ford and Kelly McGillis."
- Tom Hamilton regarding a "very Amish" postcard the guys got from a person in "Youngstown, Amish country."
"The good news is, by playing so well in the first part of the season, you've built up a bit of a cushion."
- Tom Hamilton
"Once again this team finding a way after being no-hitted for five-and-a-third."
- Tom Hamilton
"What a time for Orlando Cabrera to get his first hit as a US citizen."
- Tom Hamilton
"Think of Goose Gossage. He might have thrown a player over the outfield wall."
- Tom Hamilton on the emotions of relief pitchers
"Oh, Fred Lewis put on a clinic on how not to run the bases!"
- Tom Hamilton on Fred Lewis sort of running himself out to end the game
"Both of these teams tried to throw the game away."
- Mike Hegan
"Josh Tomlin, folks - you spell his name 'winner.'"
- Tom Hamilton
"It looked like a drill that went bad."
- Mike Hegan on the weird double steal/errors in the bottom of the 1st.
"The last time I saw a play like that was at Bleser Park in Avon Lake when [my son] Nick was 8. Little league."
- Tom Hamilton on the weird double steal/errors in the bottom of the 1st.
"Volquez looks like he's wearing a hat that is two sizes too small for his head. Like those kids wore in the Little Rascals. He has to keep tugging and pulling to keep it on. [...] Who the heck is the equipment manager for the Reds? Give the guy a bigger hat!"
- Tom Hamilton
"Michael Brantley has had two hits today that haven't gone 60 feet."
- Tom Hamilton
"Volquez says 'let's go through the signs again' and [Reds catcher] Hernandez says 'you only have 3 pitches.'"
- Tom Hamilton
"The Indians lead it 6-1 and [Reds manager] Dusty Baker is going to the mound to choke Volquez."
- Tom Hamilton
"Another broken belt. I'll have to ask [equipment manager] Tony Amato what the budget for belts is. Asdrubal has exceeded it."
- Tom Hamilton on Asdrubal's second busted belt this weekend
"Oh by the way, on our daily update of oblique injuries, on which we have someone to add every day..."
- Tom Hamilton on the latest injury for the Twins
"When you're getting over 2 baserunners an inning, you're going to score some runs."
- Tom Hamilton's great insight
"First base is open and that didn't look accidental."
- Tom Hamilton on Asdrubal nearly getting hit by a pitch in the 8th
"Brandon has not tortured the Indians this weekend like he normally does."
- Tom Hamilton
"What's really amazing about the Indians on the home portion of this schedule...they've lost four games, they've only lost to two teams [Chicago and Tampa]."
- Tom Hamilton
"Good attempt by Edgar Renteria who five years ago would have made that play."
- Tom Hamilton
"Brandon Phillips...[laughing] he went to tag Orlando Cabrera who had stopped [running to second] and instead they high-fived each other and that completed the tag!"
- Tom Hamilton
"You knew this club was better, but nobody - nobody - foresaw a 29 and 15 record. As Herb used to say, that's why you play the game. Everybody and their brother can make a prediction and 99.9% of the people who make predictions don't have anything at stake so it's easy to predict."
- Tom Hamilton
"Hernandez just kind of lumbering into third [...] Is Ramon Hernandez hurt?"
"I just think Ramon doesn't run too good. He wasn't going to score, Tom. He wasn't going to try down 8 runs."
- Tom Hamilton and Mike Hegan in the 9th
"He is having an MVP-type season."
- Tom Hamilton after Asdrubal's 6th hit in a row
"It's amazing how much velocity Asdrubal Cabrera gets on a throw with both feet off the ground."
- Tom Hamilton
"Clay Buchholz tonight acts like he gets paid by the hour."
- Tom Hamilton on the Red Sox pitcher's slowness
"How about that? If Jack stays on the bag, it's a tie ballgame."
- Mike Hegan after Hannahan caught stealing and Kearns' double in the 5th
"One of the Boston folks was saying tonight that the Red Sox would give anything to get Justin Masterson back."
- Tom Hamilton
"We've not seen Manny Acta this upset in all his time with the Indians."
- Tom Hamilton after Acta got thrown out in the 8th
"What a job by Masterson. He gets a standing ovation and he should."
- Tom Hamilton on Masterson's exit
"That wind, howling out towards right field. That makes everyone a home-run-hitter if you hit it out to right field."
- Tom Hamilton
"Welp, no such thing as a routine 9th inning."
- Tom Hamilton
"What does Cabrera not lead this club in?"
- Tom Hamilton
"I can't remember Boston starting pitchers being so slow. [...] If we had Josh Tomlin working in one of these games it'd be polar opposite of either Beckett or Buchholz."
- Tom Hamilton
"I didn't mean to say 'short and squat' did I? [...] Compact. I wish I would have thought of that first."
- Mike Hegan on Carrera's stature
"Carmonas pitches are going straight down. That's how you know his stuff is working. It's when they go sideways that things go bad."
- Tom Hamilton
"The way Beckett's pitched tonight, 4 to 1 is huge. But the way the Indians play...you never know."
- Tom Hamilton
"It's one thing to struggle. It's another to become...Pittsburgh."
- Tom Hamilton on the Twins' record this year
"Some nights we leave the booth here and say to each other 'how did they do that?' [...] We said that a lot in 2007 too."
- Tom Hamilton
"Now how in the world, with a shift on, did he get that between two guys that are part of a three-man left side of the infield?"
- Tom Hamilton on
"David Ortiz's first infield hit since 1998."
"For sure. When David Ortiz gets an infield hit you know things are going bad."
- Tom Hamilton and Mike Hegan
"Well this is a day when we need [WKYC meteorologist] Betsy Kling to whip up a storm and it needs to get here in 5 minutes and continue all day."
- Tom Hamilton after the 7-run Red Sox first inning
"You sometimes have to lose the battle to win the war."
- Tom Hamilton on making Mitch Talbot give at least 5 innings
"Albert Belle probably lost that award because he and the writers didn't have many group hugs."
- Tom Hamilton on Mo Vaughn winning the MVP over Belle in 1995
"I don't think David Rackley will want to see a replay of his game behind the plate today, for either side."
- Tom Hamilton expresses his disappointment in the home plate umpire
"Don't write any obituaries for David Ortiz just yet. He's still got some pop in that bat and some speed in that bat head."
- Mike Hegan after Ortiz's home run in the 6th
"I don't think I've seen anyone hit the ball as far foul as Shelley Duncan does. I mean, he hit that ball 100 feet foul."
- Mike Hegan
"A new ballpark isn't always the panacea. A new location - like a new city - is sometimes the answer."
- Tom Hamilton regarding the Marlins' new ballpark
"Tried to hit that ball to Sarasota."
- Tom Hamilton on an Evan Longoria swinging strike
"The Indians have 6 games this season on fake grass, turf. And they're all on this road trip. The day Grady Sizemore gets back, they have all those games on turf."
- Tom Hamilton on Grady Sizemore batting DH instead of being in the outfield
"The way David Price has dominated the Indians over the years, a 4-run lead is mammoth."
- Tom Hamilton
"The Indians middle of the order just doesn't look the same without Travis Hafner."
- Tom Hamilton
"In Manny Acta's mind that's the magic number. You don't want a losing streak to go beyond 3."
- Tom Hamilton
"Well the Tribe has not had a 9th inning rally of 5 runs or more but...why not? It's been that kind of a season."
- Tom Hamilton in the beginning of the 9th
"Boy, this team has really excited the bay area. Friday night 16,800 show up. Yikes!"
- Tom Hamilton, slammin' the lack of Rays fans
"I don't think Matt LaPorta has to guess what's coming next from a guy who is pitching 96 miles per hour in a 5-0 game."
- Tom Hamilton
"With Joe Maddon, you could see anything. He's sometimes a mad scientist."
- Tom Hamilton
"We've lost Rosie. We'll get to him in the next inning. He's still convulsing over the cat."
"That's DJ Master Cat I think."
"You like that cat don't you? He'll probably be in our hotel lobby later. [...] The kitty has gone away now and this place has gone deafly silent."
- Tom Hamilton and Jim Rosenhaus on the Ray's 7th inning entertainment
"The biggest play of this inning is the double play Ben Zobrist didn't turn."
- Tom Hamilton
"Avril Lavigne. Come on...as a man with two daughters you should know who this is."
"I'm just asking the question. Can't I invoke my fifth amendment rights? [...] As a father of daughters you might be better off not knowing."
- Jim Rosenhaus and Tom Hamilton on Tampa's post-game entertainment
"Oh boy...my wife was listening. 'Ha ha ha, Rosie got you.' Our engineer Ralph can vouch...nothing wrong with daughters, I love the daughters! When boys have a problem with friends they punch them in the nose and that's it. With daughters, it's a whole soap opera. Ralph's daughters are glaring at me now. I'm done... [...] And for all the girls out there listening, we love our daughters just as we love our sons. And that's the end of the story."
- Tom Hamilton
"Tomorrow...is not Memorial Day in Canada."
- Tom Hamilton on the upcoming Blue Jays series
"At this level, if they know you're throwing mid-90s and the only pitch you can throw is a fastball, you're not lasting long."
- Tom Hamilton commenting on Frank Hermann's previous troubles
"He is a big human being. Six-eight, 295. And like so many people his size, he's got a gret nature about him. At that size if you wanted to be an angry man, look out."
- Tom Hamilton on Rays reliever Adam Russell
"For Masterson and Carmona they both have something in common so far. They both have had a team that really owned them."
- Tom Hamilton
"The Indians are not playing very good baseball right now. They're not hitting, they're not having quality pitching, and now their defense is opening up holes."
- Tom Hamilton
"Well I hope your barbecue is better then this ballgame. If not, it means somebody forgot to turn the meat."
- Tom Hamilton
"Boy this is why you think of baseball and you just shake your head sometimes. There are things like this that you just can't predict."
- Tom Hamilton
"If you haven't won a game in 3 years and have a 10-run lead, you deserve to finish it and be on the field to shake hands at the end."
- Tom Hamilton with regards to Jo-Jo Reyes
"It is no time to panic, Rosie. Every team that gets to the playoffs - with the exception of the 1995 Indians - has a rough spot."
- Tom Hamilton
"Whether you need to change the rules or not...smarter people than me will make that decision."
- Tom Hamilton regarding the current crashing-into-catchers situation
"...We haven't had anything to laugh about on this road trip."
"It's been a tough trip."
- Tom Hamilton and Jim Rosenhaus, cracking up
"Corey Patterson was sort of looking down at the turf saying 'I can't believe I just did that.'"
- Tom Hamilton
"I'm sure everyone in Toronto looked to see who the umpire was before they bought tickets for tonight's game. They saw it was Tim McClelland and that's why we have the biggest crowd for a Blue Jays game this year. They wanted to see McClelland NOT call balls and strikes."
- Tom Hamilton on one of his many McClelland rants
"I wonder if there's something going on between Santana and Talbot. You don't see Belcher run out like that. I mean, he ran."
- Tom Hamilton with regards to an interesting meeting at the mound
"I bet this pleases the Rangers...CJ Wilson's hobbies include travelling - ok - surfing, and auto racing."
- Tom Hamilton
"I'll say one thing about home plate umpire Tim Timmons. He's been consistent in one area - he's got hitters upset on both ball clubs."
- Tom Hamilton
"Tim Timmons better not need a ride to the airport. Not one of the players would give him one!"
- Tom Hamilton, several innings later
"Boy it's a weekend when the Indians have hit a ball hard, it is right at someone."
- Tom Hamilton
"Nelson Cruz...has had two home runs in this series. What he thinks every time he comes to the plate is 'Let's see how far I can hit this puppy.'"
- Tom Hamilton
"Good news, guys! Julie is 24 and still single! But you'd better not dawdle, as pretty as Julie is..."
- Tom Hamilton during the birthday greetings
"If Travis Hafner can hit for the cycle, aaaaanyone can."
- Tom Hamilton on Brantley's performance
"Rosie has reminded me to do a station identification for the first time in about a month. Stephanie Hagel has been barking at us about it for weeks."
- Tom Hamilton
"I tell you what Tom if you saw the way he started you wouldn't think he'd be here in the 8th inning."
- Mike Hegan on Scott Baker's performance
"They've set the table but nobody's clearing it!"
- Mike Hegan on Brantley and Asdrubal's performance
"For the Minnesota Twins, the 8th and 9th innings have become the Bermuda Triangle. It's where victories get lost."
- Tom Hamilton
"That's his second bat of the day. Good thing he's going home - might not have much lumber left for a longer road trip."
- Mike Hegan on Cuddyer's broken bat
"You said it, Tom. They needed a spark from somebody, somewhere, and that just did it."
- Mike Hegan on Hannahan's game-tying homer
"If you're wondering, the Indians have 4 walk-off wins."
- Tom Hamilton
"The way Carmona is pitching right now he is helping all of the Yankees out of their slumps."
- Tom Hamilton
"Carmona just served one up and said 'see how hard you can hit it.'"
- Tom Hamilton on Granderson's homer
"I don't blame Teixiera for being angry. That is bush league to throw that high after a home run."
- Tom Hamilton on Carmona hitting Mark Teixiera after giving up a home run
"That may be the most useless news story ever."
- Tom Hamilton on a story Rosenhaus read about the official scorer wanting to make sure he scored Jeter's 3000th hit correctly
"I don't even know if I can read some of these other headlines in this paper."
"Well you can, but I'll have another partner tomorrow afternoon."
- Tom Hamilton and Jim Rosenaus on The Daily Post
"Rosie's wife Carol is pregnant with their second child, which is great news. [...] I thought it was pregnant women who liked ice cream and pickles, but Rosie is going through ice cream here nobody's business. [...] You went through that ice cream like Sherman went through Georgia."
- Tom Hamilton
"If people could see what you destroyed before we went on the air tonight..."
- Jim Rosenhaus to Tom Hamilton in defense of his ice cream
"Those customs people at the air port are like 'Look, I don't want this job, I don't want to be here, so you are going to be miserable too.' You say 'hi' and they look at you like 'what did you mean by that?'"
- Tom Hamilton on going through customs
"We just heard that the grounds crew has been spotted on Long Island. I guess they are heading to the Hamptons for the weekend."
- Tom Hamilton on the rainy 7th inning
"There's a guy in the stands here who looks exactly like President Obama. Since they put him up on the big board, that guy hasn't bought his own beer all night."
- Tom Hamilton
"That just shows how your bullpen is in disarray, when you have to go to Mariano Rivera when down by 6 in the 9th."
- Tom Hamilton
"Former Indian Bartolo Colon has had a rejuvenation. The question is how did it come about...That's a topic for another time."
- Tom Hamilton on Colon's miraculous shoulder surgery that turned him from a guy in his early 30s pitching in the 80s to a guy in his late 30s pitching in the 90s.
"Carmona maintains he didn't try to hit him. New York maintains 'baloney!'"
- Tom Hamilton on Carmona hitting Mark Teixeira.
"Robinson Cano better drive the speed limit on the way home."
- Tom Hamilton after Cano hit a policeman with a foul ball
"Somehow some way he is going to make his way through it. He has made a miraculous recovery."
- Tom Hamilton after A-Rod came back in the game after being hit by Talbot. Rodriguez made a spectacular display of anguish "as if he was shot by a sniper." It was very Varejão.
"You only give up 3 runs against the Yankees, it feels like you should win."
- Tom Hamilton
"If you're in the upper deck you are a long way from the action."
"And if you're in the lower seats you're either a multi-millionaire or you snuck in."
- Jim Rosenhaus and Tom Hamilton
"C.B. Bucknor is one of the nicest men, but the worst umpire."
- Tom Hamilton
"Jack Nicholson made that movie before he got courtside seats to the LA Lakers. But that movie helped him get those seats."
- Tom Hamilton explaining One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest for the youngsters. The movie came up because apparently Yankee pitcher Freddie Garcia looks like the character Chief and carries that nickname.
"You can eat all the sushi you want but you still have to age. A lot of players are eating sushi like it's the fountain of youth. [...] I'm not saying sushi is bad, just give me some Lake Erie perch, fried up."
- Tom Hamilton
"The Indians have pretty much let everybody back in to the [penant] race."
- Tom Hamilton
"[Umpire] Mike Muchlinski tells him 'look that's not going to be ball 3 after you just took a bunt like that.'"
- Tom Hamilton
"Well they just made an announcement here at Yankee Stadium that should clear some of the park. Eduardo Nunez is coming in to bat and play short for Derek Jeter."
- Tom Hamilton
"Boy, Jack Hannahan has played Gold Glove third base all season long."
- Tom Hamilton
"This might be one of those games where if you're going to win you've got to win one to nothing."
- Tom Hamilton
"The Indians looking to get out of New York with a 1-run win or better, and hoping that the Tigers and Tampa Bay play 23 innings."
- Tom Hamilton
"So the Indians defensively are letting down Justin Masterson."
- Tom Hamilton
"A fan somehow reached up and snagged that foul ball. That's the kind of defense the Indians are looking for."
- Tom Hamilton
"Right now the way he [Verlander] looks, I'd be shocked if the Indians got a hit. Nothing against the Indians offense but this kid would be no-hitting anybody tonight."
- Tom Hamilton
"I wonder how many people in the Motor City are trying to get down here to get a ticket tonight. History is in the making."
- Tom Hamilton
"Catcher Alex Avila goes to the mound and says to Penny 'Look you've got three pitches, which one are you going to throw?'"
- Jim Rosenhaus
"You get the feeling the Indians are going to get to Brad Penny tonight."
- Tom Hamilton
"He realized it wasn't the beard, it was him."
"Shaved it off and hit a home run!"
- Tom Hamilton and Mike Hegan on Brennan Boesch's ex-beard
"If Fausto Carmona can throw strikes, Ordonez cannot hit them."
- Tom Hamilton
"I'll tell you what, he takes after mama's side of the family. Because his dad was a big strapping lineman."
- Tom Hamilton on Tiger relief pitcher Daniel Schlerech
"He'd have to be Carlton Fisk to get that one. Or maybe Dirk Nowitzki."
- Mike Hegan on a high wild pitch
"This guy you just hold your breath every time he comes to the plate."
- Tom Hamilton on Miguel Cabrera (no relation)
"He coulda used a relay man there. Hand him a baton...somebody else to go the other 35 feet."
- Mike Hegan on Miguel Cabrera's slowness out of the box
"I said to Tony [Sipp] the other day, how did Clemson do in the post season? 'Don't know, don't care.'"
- Tom Hamilton on Tony Sipp's Clemson coach telling him he'll never make it in the pros
"Sometimes you win, sometimes you lose. And Charlie's got the blues."
"[...] By the way, I didn't ignore that. I had something deep to say and now I've lost it..."
- Tom Hamilton cracking up Mike Hegan
"The Indians get a little-league home run and lead one to nothing."
- Tom Hamilton
"One - where was Boesch going? And second - that's a dangerous play! [...] It's a routine first inning, folks..."
- Tom Hamilton on Asdrubal's double play to end the first inning
"Wow...Brennan Boesch runs like he's 50!"
- Tom Hamilton on Boesch missing a ball in the outfield in the 3rd
"Some of the umpires that paid to get in today are not happy with that call. They always put them in the good seats behind the plate, too."
- Jim Rosenhaus
"One thing to say about Jose Valverde...he is not on any kind of a fruit diet."
- Tom Hamilton on the Tigers' 6'4" 255# closer
"Valverde's body language would give you the idea that the last place in the world he wants to be is Comerica Park."
- Tom Hamilton
"Right now he's the Dominican's version of Burl Ives. Throws a little harder tho."
- Tom Hamilton on Valverde's goatee
"The Indians as a team hitting .500 with the bases loaded."
- Jim Rosenhaus
"I called it the Yake. Yacobs field, that's how I remember it."
- Carlos Baerga
"He has my name so that is why he had to hit a home run today."
- Carlos Baerga on Carlos Santana's home run
"Michael Brantley...stay with it! He's hitting it as hard as he can but has nothing to show for it so far."
- Jim Rosenhaus
"I used to have to write in 'Mike Hegan' 300 times each season."
"I got 301 votes. Three-hundred from you and one from my wife."
- Jim Rosenhaus and Mike Hegan on All-Star voting
"Wood putting the drama back in to the intentional walk."
- Jim Rosenhaus on Tim Wood's sort of wild intentional balls
"All the ingredients that made this team so successful earlier in the season were on display tonight."
- Jim Rosenhaus
"The final count was over 60,000 dogs last night. [...] Sales of antacid in the Cleveland area were high today."
- Jim Rosenhaus on Friday's Dollar Dog Night
"Hammy is our big toe."
- Jim Rosenhaus on Tom Hamilton's absence
"Nobody can hit that breaking ball, Mike."
"Not just this ball club, nobody period."
- Jim Rosenhaus and Mike Hegan on Carrasco's breaking ball
"How many hitters would have watched it and not gotten to 3rd base?"
- Jim Rosenhaus on Grady's home-run-turned-triple
"The most confused guy in the ballpark right now is Juan Nicasio."
- Mike Hegan on Santana's homer in the 4th
"He was cruising along and ran into a little bit of trouble, then BANG the roof caved in on him."
- Mike Hegan on Fausto's departure
"Florida has a new manager, who's an old manager. [...] Jack McKeon, the first year he managed in the big leagues, President Nixon was going through the Watergate scandal."
- Tom Hamilton on the hiring of interim manager Jack McKeon in Florida
"Manny Acta just loves the way Michael Brantley goes about his business."
- Tom Hamilton
"I have no idea what was wrong with it...wait, I do know. There was nothing wrong with it. [...] So if it's down the middle of the plate, it's a ball to Todd Helton."
- Tom Hamilton hating on umpire Gerry Davis
"Pronkville is begging for a souvenir."
- Tom Hamilton
"People listen to these games and they actually believe you guys! I pay for that in the offseason!"
- Jim Rosenhaus taking Mike Hegan to task for suggesting that he was wearing pink high heels
"Chacin is walking around the mound thinking to himself 'Why can't I throw strikes over the corners of the plate?'"
- Tom Hamilton on Chacin's multiple walks
"Those 'All You Can Eat Seats' ... great time to go to the ballpark and then get a physical the next day."
- Tom Hamilton
"The way the wind is blowing now, it'll be easier to rally from behind."
- Tom Hamilton puts a positive spin on the impending storm
"They put a 'no doubles' defense on at Coors Field and doubles will be dropping in everywhere."
- Tom Hamilton
"I asked Orlando Cabrera how he liked playing third base, and he just shook his head."
- Tom Hamilton
"He either caught a spike or he simply had a brain cramp."
- Tom Hamilton on Hammel's balk
"He twisted so hard he almost spun into the ground!"
- Mike Hegan on Hafner's home run swing
"A year ago, the Indians were 13.5 games out of first. And 20 games below .500. What a turnaround!"
- Tom Hamilton
"And the Tribe bullpen is still shutting them down. What else is new?"
- Tom Hamilton after the top of the 8th
"Boy, Choo hit a 2-iron that just didn't get high enough!"
- Tom Hamilton
"Carrasco was outmatched from the moment he stepped in to the batter's box."
- Tom Hamilton on Carrasco's first at-bat
"Folks if you need to go do something, you can go do it now because [Carrasco] isn't going to help himself."
"He swung at one that was over his head last time I think."
- Tom Hamilton and Jim Rosenhaus on Carrasco's second at-bat
"Yeah but when you're Kung-Fu Panda, you don't just throw to first to end a game you have to put a little style in it."
- Tom Hamilton admiring Pablo Sandoval's nickname
"If you're looking for Jimmy Hoffa you might want to look in Brian Wilson's beard. [...] How much shoe polish does it take to dye that thing jet black?"
"Who would have thought the Abe Lincoln look would be in vogue?"
- Tom Hamilton and Jim Rosenhaus on Giants pitcher Brian Wilson's beard
"He charged the slow chopper and did everything but kick it into the seats."
- Tom Hamilton on Santana's second error in the 6th inning
"You play the world champions in their park, you can't beat yourself. And that's what the Indians are doing here."
- Tom Hamilton
"No matter what happens this inning, it just has not been a very good weekend. [...] They're just not doing the little things and the little things are what got them to 30 and 15."
- Tom Hamilton
"It's supposed to be a high of 111 degrees [in Arizona]. But, the natives will tell you 'It's a dry heat.' Satan will tell you Hell is a dry heat!"
"An oven is dry heat but you don't put your head in there!"
"Good thing we're indoors, which the entire state of Arizona is indoors."
- Tom Hamilton and Jim Rosenhaus on the weather in Arizona
"If one of those sail boats goes over, since we're high up here is it our job to call the Coast Guard?"
- Jim Rosenhaus
"Travis Buck has racked up the frequent flyer miles going between home and Columbus."
- Tom Hamilton
"And how 'bout the kid?"
- Tom Hamilton on Lonnie Chisenhall
"My friend went golfing today, his tee-time was 2:30. Since nobody is outside golfing since it's so darned hot, it was $7 to tee off at 2:30 on a nice course!"
- Tom Hamilton can't believe how hot it is in Arizona
"From the outside it looks like an airplane hangar. You'd never know it was a baseball stadium from the outside."
- Tom Hamilton on Chase Field
"They're all down his arms, coming up his neck. He's missing the Mike Tyson face tattoo but that's about it...I didn't go any further than that. That's taking reporting a little too far."
- Jim Rosenhaus on Ryan Roberts' tattoos
"Based on how they are ordering things down below, the staff Christmas party is OFF. The budget has been blown."
- Tom Hamilton on the Indians' back office party downstairs
"He doesn't look comfortable against the submarine style pitching of Joe Smith. Most right-handers don't feel comfortable."
- Tom Hamilton on Justin Upton
"Tony Sipp is not paying any attention to the baserunner. You just can't do that in a tie game in the 9th!"
- Tom Hamilton
"We're in the desert! If you don't believe me, the temperature is 113 degrees and the humidity is 18 percent."
- Tom Hamilton
"Sorry Ryan Roberts, you're not that good. Carlos Carrasco is not trying to hit you. Unless Rosie told you to, because of all the tattoos, which seem to really bother [Rosenhause] this series."
- Tom Hamilton
"That's a little play, that doesn't end up in the box score...but just a little slide prevented a double play. [...] Now you've got runners at the corners with one out."
- Tom Hamilton on Austin Kearns' baserunning in the 3rd
"The park is air-conditioned and your car is air-conditioned, but people don't want to make the walk from the car to the ballpark in this heat."
- Jim Rosenhaus on the struggle to get people to come to day games in Arizona
"You come to this balllpark and you'd better score runs. You're not going to see many 1-0 games in this ballpark."
- Tom Hamilton
"Justin Masteron has a lead!"
- Tom Hamilton, after just 2 innings
"Can you imagine Brett Favre uncorking a throw from short?"
- Tom Hamilton talking about Favre's amature baseball career
"Dusty [Baker] thought 'if that idiot on the radio thought of it, why didn't I think of it two innings ago?'"
- Tom Hamilton noticing that the Reds got someone warming up as soon as he mentioned it
"Does anybody ever get hurt when they're in a slump?"
- Tom Hamilton on the exit of the hot-hitting Travis Buck
"Boy, it's hard to think of a third baseman right now who has a stronger throwing arm than Lonnie Chisenhall."
- Tom Hamilton
"If the Indians are in town, Brandon Phillips is going to have a big weekend. He just absolutely TORTURES the Indians. It's almost as if he wants to make sure the Indians never forget they let him get away."
- Tom Hamilton
"We're going to get to see the Cuban Missle, Aroldis Chapman. He can throw 100 miles an hour, but there's a chance he'll also throw it up here to our broadcast booth."
- Tom Hamilton Aroldis Chapman's control
"Two hours for Rowland, but an hour and twenty minutes for Rosie."
"You gotta make up your mind. I've been accused of driving slowly before, too."
- Tom Hamilton on driving from Cincinnatti to Indianapolis
"All Drew Stubbs is trying to do right now is padding his stolen base total. You know what's going to happen to Drew Stubbs this weekend? He's going to get drilled."
- Tom Hamilton does not like you trying to steal when we've given up trying to throw you out
"What the remaining Reds fans are saying now is that the fireworks better be phenomenal. Because the game got ugly quick for Reds fans."
- Tom Hamilton
"This is why having American League teams have to do this is idiotic. Having the pitchers bat, all that is going to happen is your pitcher gets hurt."
- Tom Hamilton DOES NOT LIKE when AL teams have to bat their pitcher
"In most years in the American league if you have an ERA under 4.0 you're leading the league."
- Tom Hamilton on the Indians' team ERA of 3.65
"The bats have come alive since they left San Francisco!"
- Tom Hamilton
"There's no question that National League lineups in no way compare to the American League. Part of it is the DH but there's just not good hitting in the National League."
- Tom Hamilton
"For nine days I twiddled my thumbs until the 7th inning then hoped I got an at-bat."
- Travis Hafner to Tom Hamilton
"They don't like the balls and strikes being called, but get used to it that's what he did in the first inning! [...] One thing about the Yankees - they never believe that a call should go against them."
- Tom Hamilton on a dust-up between the Yankees catcher and the home plate umpire
"I don't think anyone in the American League is sorry to see [pitchers batting] go."
"You know who will miss it? Josh Tomlin. He got some great hits!"
- Mike Hegan and Jim Rosenhaus on pitchers batting
"CC Sabathia already said 'I'm going to the Bahamas, don't call.'"
- Tom Hamilton on the All Star Game picks
"The last time these teams faced each other on the 4th of July was here, 5 years ago, and the Indians won 19-1! Tonight, nothing but goose eggs!"
- Tom Hamilton
"His numbers have started to drop a little with age. And a lack of vitamins."
- Tom Hamilton does not like A-Rod taking "vitamins" (HE MEANS STEROIDS)
"Well it had to have hit something or Teixeira would have caught it. He catches everything!"
- Tom Hamilton on a mysterious bounce in the 7th
"How about...you get your first home run on the 4th of July against the New York Yankees, and your second hit off of AJ Burnett?"
- Tom Hamilton on Kearns' homer
"Vinnie Pestano was 10 during Derek Jeter's rookie year."
- Tom Hamilton
"It doesn't matter how the weather is at home, how the wind is blowing. It's blowing in tonight and they just hit two more homers at home! We all know how miserable the spring was in Cleveland yet the Indians have now hit 53 home runs at home, 24 on the road."
- Tom Hamilton
"This is kind of a micrcosm of this season. This ballclub does not rely on one guy."
- Tom Hamilton
"That was vintage Sizemore!"
- Jim Rosenhaus after Grady's awesome catch in the 5th
"The problem with a 2-0 lead...if you're Manny Acta you hold your breath every time a Yankee comes to the plate with a man on."
- Tom Hamilton
"The Indians have had so many opportunities, they need to cash in here or rue the day."
- Tom Hamilton on having the bases loaded
"Well you don't have to guess where Boone Logan is from. Texas. With a name like that he's not from North Dakota."
- Tom Hamilton
"With bases loaded and less than 2 outs they're hitting .613 as a team."
- Tom Hamilton, on the Indians
"I don't think Villanueva is going to invite Dana DeMuth for a late-night dinner."
- Tom Hamilton on the home-plate umpire's tight strike zone
"They've got a shift on for Hafner. My goodness, there is a second baseman in right field, about 40 feet."
- Tom Hamilton
"The Indians have the makings of a pretty good rec league basketball team now with [McAllister], Masterson...Carlos Carrasco is a big boy too, maybe on point."
- Jim Rosenhaus
"You know, 94 pitches here in the big leagues, the way he had to work so hard, is like 120 pitches down in Columbus."
- Mike Hegan on McAllister's pitch count
"This game has had the pace of the old tortise and the hare race. [...] As we've said before, some 4 hour games are too short and some 3 hour games are too long. This game is too long."
- Mike Hegan after 3 hours
"Encarnacion jumps up in the air and he's not happy. But he's got to get in line, Dana DeMuth has 15 other people unhappy with his calls tonight."
- Tom Hamilton after Encarnacion strikes out
"If the Indians don't win this game, they have only themselves to blame."
- Tom Hamilton
"You don't want to be down 3 runs but if you have to be down 3 runs this is the situation you want to face."
- Mike Hegan with Hafner up and the bases loaded
"A night of utter frustration ends with one of the best 9th innings ever at Progressive Field."
- Tom Hamilton
"Basically when you see what we saw last night from Travis Hafner, it's like seeing a perfect game, frequency-wise."
- Tom Hamilton
"So much for the Indians being able to capitalize off the momentum of last night's comeback."
- Tom Hamilton
"You wonder how many starts he's going to get before the Indians go to triple-A."
- Tom Hamilton on Mitch Talbot
"Try to figure out this one. Jo-Jo Reyes goes three years without a win, and he's trying to beat them for the second time this year."
- Tom Hamilton
"Well the good news for the Indians is that they have Josh Tomlin tomorrow."
- Tom Hamilton
"You can't go into the 9th inning down 5 or 6 runs thinking 'Well, we'll get 'em, just like last night.'"
- Tom Hamilton
"All the time, Orlando Cabrera seems to be in the middle of it."
- Tom Hamilton on Orlando at bat as the tying run
"Boy that's what happens when you have a home plate umpire who acts like he's never called balls and strikes before."
- Tom Hamilton is not amused
"I can't think of anyone else who's given up 9 this year..."
"Oh, Fausto. He gave up 10."
"[Laughing] Well, you know, I was trying to come up with 9 not 10..."
"We weren't laughing that day were we?"
- Tom Hamilton and Mike Hegan on Charlie Furbush giving up 9 runs today
"There is something about watching the All Star game and seeing your club first in the standings."
- Tom Hamilton
"The Indians have preached and preached both to Carmona and Carrasco - when you're in trouble quit trying to trick hitters."
- Tom Hamilton
"It almost looks like some guys are on the All Star break too soon."
- Tom Hamilton
"John Farrel feels Jose Bautista has done enough damage for the weekend."
- Tom Hamilton on Bautista leaving the game
"He's like Secretariat right now."
- Tom Hamilton on Bautista leading in homers by so many
"A year ago at this time, the Cleveland Indians were 20 games under .500 and 15 games out of first. This has not been a good weekend but look at the first half as a whole."
- Tom Hamilton
"The Indians may be the only playoff contender that doesn't need bullpen help."
- Tom Hamilton
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