Friday, May 11, 2012

A Whole Lot of Nothing

Wow man - 4 hours of baseball and it's almost like nothing happened. Do you remember much of this game? I kept looking at the scoreboard on MLB Gameday thinking "Oh cool, there's still a lot of innings left..."

Of course the thing you'll remember most about this game is that Ubaldo Jiminez sucked. It's a good thing to remember so you don't get your hopes up too much next time he's slated to pitch. Now, he might surprise you like he did last time he pitched and it'll be an even better surprise when you think he's going to suck. But he's probably going to suck.

Here's some nice things, tho - Dan Wheeler and Tony Sipp had to cover 4 innings and they did so without giving up any runs and Sipp struck out 3. We didn't even need Pestano and Smith tonight!

The Red Sox have scored an average of 9.5 runs every time Clay Buchholz (9.09 ERA) pitches. Except for tonight! Jiminez "held" them to 7. Wahoo!

Almost everybody hit tonight except Asdrubal. Can you believe it?! He did get 2 walks and came in to score 2 runs so his average is still safely at .333.

I'm not going to talk about Johnny Damon tonight, as this is the Positive Tribe and not the Obvious Tribe.

Kipnis and Hafner worked some of their shit out and both went 2 for 4 with a walk.

Santana, that bugger...he is still swinging for the fences every time I think. I don't think since John Nunnally  was fired that anyone has told Santana to stop moving his foot so much when he bats. Last year when he woke up from his slump the big news was "we told him to stop moving his foot and look what he did!" I saw the boy batting live last week. I was really close. I could hear the polyester rubbing on his jockeys as the pitch came in. SOMEONE TELL HIM TO COOL IT!!

He did go 1 for 3 tonight with 2 walks so at least he's having patience.

Choo is looking better even if he's not getting the balls to drop. He's got 9 hits over his last 10 games with doubles in the last 2 games. He's been smokin' the ball just right at people. I don't think he was even making contact before (16 strikeouts in April) so this is indeed progress.

 Brantley is settling back in at the bottom of the lineup, hitting 7th today and going 2 for 5. Since the entire lineup was hitting today, it gave Brantley a chance to collect 2 RBI too. He still doesn't have the .335 average I bragged he would but I said he'd have it WHEN GRADY GETS BACK. So that means he has until infinity to get up there right? Heynow!

Casey Kotchman is going to break .200 any day now. Aaaaaaany day. He went 1 for 5 tonight and then handed it off to Donald who stole a base. Can you imagine, Donald at first? Me neither!

Supermanahan still blastin' the hits with his third 2-hit game in a row. Oddly enough he didn't get any of our 5 RBI tonight. But he does look good in a kilt.

We had 12 hits and 6 walks tonight and 14 LOB. *Astonished Smiley* That's crazy! That's why it took 4 hours and I guess that's why we didn't win. The best thing about tonight was that we've still got the good half of the bullpen rested for the weekend. And we don't have to see Ubaldo for 5 more days. Schwing! (Yep, I said "Schwing!")

Tomorrow is a 7:10 game and it's on WKYC so I literally cancelled fun plans so I could sit home and watch baseball. It's our man Josh Tomlin who is going to go for a career-high 9 strikeouts. How hard can it be?

See you there!

Radio Chatter:
"Boston has lost 11 of 15 of their home games this year, which is unusual for Boston. Usually teams come here and melt."
- Tom Hamilton

"There's no energy at the park tonight. It's like they spend all day yelling at the television and are exhausted by the time they get to the ballpark. They've spent all day being angry at Josh Beckett."
- Tom Hamilton

"The good news is Clay Buchholz's ERA is 9.9. The bad news is that the Red Sox score 9 runs every time he pitches."
- Tom Hamilton

"Jared Saltalamachia would like to be known for something other than having the longest name in baseball."
- Tom Hamilton

"Let's face it - Sam from Cheers is a former Red Sox pitcher, he wasn't a Patriot."
- Tom Hamilton on the difference between baseball and football in Boston

"Fenway Park has become quiet as a church on Sunday. [...] The only difference is no matter what your religion is, you're not going to be booing the minister like this place."
- Tom Hamilton with the bases loaded and one out in the 7th

"Nobody is going to leave Fenway Park saying 'Wasn't that a game to remember?' Unless Neil Diamond was actually sitting next to them singing 'Sweet Caroline' in the 8th inning."
- Tom Hamilton

"Paul Revere could have gone on his ride, gone around to tell everyone the British were coming, come home and had a few beers and some pizza and still caught the last 3 innings of this game."
- Tom Hamilton

"They probably took some of the gifts, if they were cash, and let their step-dad Bruce Jenner get another face lift."
- Tom Hamilton thinks this game lasted longer than Kim Kardashian's marriage and wonders if people got their gifts back

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