Wednesday, July 20, 2011

Somebody Call Brantley's Mom

And get him some Gatorade and soda crackers. Because earlier this year I had what he's got right now (stomach flu) and that's the only thing that made it better. That, and copious amounts of sleep.

The only thing that would have made it better faster was if my mom was there to do stuff for me, like buy more Gatorade and soda crackers, and maybe clean my bathroom every few hours.

So somebody get Michael Brantley's mom out to wherever he is because he is not getting better fast enough. And I have had it up to HERE with Luis Valbuena! Never liked that guy in the infield and I sure as heck don't like him in the outfield, where he seems to be even more inept.

Argh. I said some un-nice things about Valbuena today on Facebook and one of my friends chastised me for the sentiments not being positive, but I positively dislike Luis Valbuena as a baseball player.

I actually missed the beginning of the game today. It was one of those deals where I was all "Oh boy, baseball!" around 10 or 11 AM. Then I got all in to work and when I looked up it was 3 PM! Good for me for getting some work done but I was quite perturbed by the time Valbuena lost the game.

Josh Tomlin had his 30th game going 5+ innings today (or was it 29th?) Only player to do it since 1919. Tribe fans are really familiar with this stat from this year, I wonder if anyone else is? Do they mention it on ESPN?

Tomlin did give up 4 runs but it was about 200 degrees and wet out there so I'm just glad he bothered to show up, really.

Joe Smith came in for an inning of relief and thank God he didn't give up any runs, because it's seriously important to me that his ERA goes back under 1. I don't know why it is, but it is! So, GO JOE!

Our man Sipp could not keep his shit together today, again. He gave up 3. Well, Luis Valbuena helped him give up 3 and so did Orlando Cabrera. Sipp actually struck a guy out. Luis was just too tired from having to run all the way out to left field to help a brother out.

Pestano came in and did a lovely job, but it was too late and Valbuena was still in left. So we lost the game.

If the bullpen mafia was a real mafia, I would be scared to wake up tomorrow as Luis Valbuena. Just sayin.

Enough about Valbuena tho, let's talk about some rookies we LIKE. Such as Ezequiel Carrera and Lonnie Chisenhall!

I was sad to see Zeke go after he was brought up in the Great Pitching Drought of 2011 (last week) but fate and the loss of 3 outfielders (Sizemore, Brantley, Buck) let him stick around and show us what he could do. He was very Brantley in the 1-spot today, getting 2 hits and scoring a run. He also has happy feet and got caught stealing. But I think he's going to keep trying to be Willie Mays Hays in order to keep his job.

Asdrubal continues to be Asdrubal, with two hits including a double. Not sure why his average isn't back up over .300. Oh yeah that's right, because he's had almost 400 at-bats already! He's tied for 4th in the AL. Third for games. I bet he's livid that he missed a game before the All Star Game! Grr!

Hafner was good for a walk and a double today. He's hitting reliably but not exceptionally just yet. Only .216 in his last 10 games. But, I still like him way better than Santana batting cleanup.

Oh yeah, back to our new guys. Lonnie Chisenhall got a homer off Joe Nathan, which isn't too shabby since it's Joe Nathan and he hasn't given up but 4 other homers this year. It was a rather long homer in the 9th, but sadly too little too late. Because Austin Kearns and Luis Valbuena were up next and...well, they can't all be magical 9th innings.

We all have tomorrow off and then the next game is Friday night at 7:05 against the White Sox, at home. With Carlos Carrasco, yay! (I hope yay, right?)

What I also hope happens is that Luis Valbuena makes an absolute fool out of me and does something spectacular in the game so I can eat my hat. Wouldn't that be nice?! I would love to eat my hat, LUIS. DO YOU HEAR ME?!

Have a good night off, and see you then!

Radio Chatter:
"He is a good closer because he immediately puts a bad night behind him. You would not have known this morning that he had a bad save last night. Now, the bubble gum bucket knows he had a blown save..."
- Tom Hamilton on Chris Perez

"I get the feeling Rosie, before this day is done, this game is going to be won by offense."
- Tom Hamilton in the 4th inning

"Tomorrow you'll look and say 'Cabrera grounded out, what's the big deal?' That's one of the best at-bats Cabrera has had on this roadtrip."
- Tom Hamilton on Orlando's 10-pitch at-bat in the 4th

"You can hear the crowd saying 'No! No! Don't put him in!"
- Tom Hamilton re-using his Matt Capps repitoire

"In baseball if you have a player in an unfamiliar position, the ball will find him, and at critical times."
- Tom Hamilton on Valbuena missing a ball in the 8th

"Sandy Alomar said it best 'This game of baseball is for those who are humbled and those who are about to be humbled.'"
- Tom Hamilton

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