Right-Side Up

Oh my god how much do we love Carlos Carrasco?! His June was awesome, giving up just 4 runs over 6 starts! And he finagled 4 wins out of those 5 starts too. He got 28 strikeouts in those 5 games and only walked 5.

Wow, wow! I would give you some numbers to compare him to our other starters in June (who aren't horrible themselves) but MLB.com seems to have rolled out a new Web technology today on their previously-very-nice stats section and rendered it useless for the moment.

Any of you out there play fantasy baseball, and any of you pick up Carrasco? I told my brother to pick him up for today and if he "lost it" then dump him. My brother did not pick him up - and Carlos did not lose it. Woohoo!

Carrasco also batted ok today. He's no Josh Tomlin, of course, but he did do 2 successful sac bunts! One of those bunts led to a run scored, even.

Relieving Carrasco in the 8th and 9th were Pestano and then Chris Perez. They did what you thought they'd do, bitches.

The team was going cr-azy today with hits, getting FIFTEEN and walking 6 times, as well as one HBP. That's 21 men on base. Er...which if you think about it is sort of weak that we only got 6 runs...

Nevertheless...! FIVE doubles for our guys today! I'm just going to roll down the lineup like I did in the old days (April) and tell you how awesome everybody was.

Michael Brantley! Walked once and got one hit, so is he out of his slump? Eh, maybe not. He only has 7 hits over the last 10 games but they all came in like 3 games. Ouch! He did get one RBI and score one run.

Ok ok the NEXT guy is much more exciting than Brantley right now. Orlando! Know how many hits he got today? FOUR hits! He got one RBI and scored two. Orlando got his 12th double of the season, and he's hit 3 doubles over the past 4 games. Combined with that game-winning homer from Monday, he's all of a sudden our power guy! I told you this weather was good for old guys, right?

Asdrubal. What did you expect of him today? Three for 5 with a walk and an RBI? Yeah sounds about right. Does he lead the team in doubles? Uh, yeah! Does he lead AL short stops? Duh! Does he lead the league? Of course not...but he's in the top 10!

Carlos Santana! Got the game's first run right there in the first inning. For every strikeout he had, he was also on base. Good enough?

Shelley Duncan, later replaced by Travis Buck. Together they went 2 for 4 with a run, an RBI and a walk. Buck got one of them doubles, too.

Red alert! Austin Kearns even managed to get a hit today! There was magic in the climate-controlled air!

Sweet Lou Marson! Looking quite sharp running those bases. He went 2 for 4 with a walk and a run scored, getting one of those doubles.

Even Supermanahan, who we still hang our heads and say "well, he's really good at third base..." got in on the act and got himself a double as well, and a walk.

All-in-all, our lineup wrung out 5 of their pitchers while our guys breezed through. Honestly it seemed like Pestano and Perez came in just for some exercise. Agreed?

In case you were wondering, the Diamondbacks are no slouches. In fact they have a slightly higher winning percentage than we do (our .532 to their .537). It's not like we just rolled over the Royals or something. It was a great show against an evenly-matched team. Huzzah!

Just three more games without Hafner (and, like, a million without Choo...) and we'll be back home, hitting home runs and enjoying the Eastern time zone.

In the meantime, you've got tonight off and tomorrow night too, and we're back in it on Friday at 7:05 in Cincinnati! Oh man, we totally won't be seeing our friend Edinson Volquez pitching on that trip. Bummer! Ah well, I'm sure we can beat up on the Reds' other pitchers just fine.

See you Friday!

Radio Chatter:
"We're in the desert! If you don't believe me, the temperature is 113 degrees and the humidity is 18 percent."
- Tom Hamilton

"Sorry Ryan Roberts, you're not that good. Carlos Carrasco is not trying to hit you. Unless Rosie told you to, because of all the tattoos, which seem to really bother [Rosenhause] this series."
- Tom Hamilton

"That's a little play, that doesn't end up in the box score...but just a little slide prevented a double play. [...] Now you've got runners at the corners with one out."
- Tom Hamilton on Austin Kearns' baserunning in the 3rd

"The park is air-conditioned and your car is air-conditioned, but people don't want to make the walk from the car to the ballpark in this heat."
- Jim Rosenhaus on the struggle to get people to come to day games in Arizona

Backwards

So this is weird...1) All of our starting lineup hit except two guys - Brantley and Asdrubal 2) Our bullpen gave up 4 runs in 2 innings 3) We LOST in walk-off fashion

What is going on here?! It was weird enough that the game was won yesterday by Orlando Cabrera's homer (??) but this is almost too much weirdness. If tonight were game 82, I'd be freaked out that it was the beginning of Opposite Half.

Don't worry, it's only game 78.

So hey, how about that Josh Tomlin? Not only did dude give us 7 solid innings only giving up 2 runs and striking out 4...but he also recouped one of those two runs HIS OWN DAMN SELF by singling in a run! How about that?!

And...AND...he picked off their pitcher in to end the 5th. Good game, Josh Tomlin...goooooood game.

On the radio one of the guys noted that both starters were strong (indeed, AZ's guy also gave up 2 and got an RBI!) but if we could get to the bullpen it'd be smooth sailing for us. Since our bullpen is so superior and stuff. And it IS! Except not tonight! WTF?

The bullpen just wasn't their rock-solid selves. Granted, you can't give up 0 runs every inning forever. It was seriously, seriously unfortunate that Raffy and Sipp both gave up their first runs in forever on the same night.

Our lineup was goofy and B-list tonight but really, we scored 4 runs and got 8 hits. Tonight definitely wasn't a case of the batters letting the pitcher down.

Lonnie Chisenhall was on it again tonight, smacking his 2nd double in as many major league appearances. He came around to score a run too.

Also with doubles tonight are the suddenly-powerful Orlando and Shelley "Happy To Be Here" Duncan! Shelley had some leather playing first, too, but also had a bit of a blown play later on. But hey, he was almost filling the position of "warm body" today so it's all good.

Carlos Santana! Dude tied the game up with a 2-run dinger in the 9th and it was a-freaking-mazing. How many of you called it? I know I totally did!

Also, how many of you think "ugh, Carlos Santana. He needs to hit a goddamn home run right now and not strike out" every time he comes up to bat? Yeah, me too. And yeah, that's "calling it."

All in all not bad stuff from our Hafner-Choo-LaPorta-Hannahan-less skeleton crew tonight. Imagine how it might have been if Brantley wasn't in a slump (the Twitterverse called it official). Grady's in a slump too. And imagine if Asdrubal wasn't, I don't know...sad because he hates being in Arizona thinking about how half a million people think Derek Jeter is better than him? Something. He wasn't too shabby yesterday! I think the new ASG counts came out today, though...

3:40 PM game tomorrow (I did not know this, my damn calendar says 9:40!) and guess who's pitching? It's our favorite guy Carlos Carrasco! Their starter looks crummy. And you know our bullpen won't be bad two days in a row, it just does. not. happen. If they truly are any sort of mafia, someone will leave a dead animal of some sort in someone else's locker and a message will be sent and no one will give up any runs until sometime in August.

See you tomorrow!

Radio Chatter:
"From the outside it looks like an airplane hangar. You'd never know it was a baseball stadium from the outside."
- Tom Hamilton on Chase Field

"They're all down his arms, coming up his neck. He's missing the Mike Tyson face tattoo but that's about it...I didn't go any further than that. That's taking reporting a little too far."
- Jim Rosenhaus on Ryan Roberts' tattoos

"Based on how they are ordering things down below, the staff Christmas party is OFF. The budget has been blown."
- Tom Hamilton on the Indians' back office party downstairs

"He doesn't look comfortable against the submarine style pitching of Joe Smith. Most right-handers don't feel comfortable."
- Tom Hamilton on Justin Upton

"Tony Sipp is not paying any attention to the baserunner. You just can't do that in a tie game in the 9th!"
- Tom Hamilton

Snakes and Ladders

Wow man. I was really scared coming in to this game, I'm not going to lie. With the way we played over the weekend and the recent outings of their starter, I was really afraid we were going to completely blow it in front of my aunt & uncle, who are DBackers to the point of having a shrine room. And we'd fall further behind the Tigers in the standings.

I also worried that all of our barking for Lonnie Chisenhall to be brought up would be for naught as he struggled to get settled in the majors.

I was wrong, I was wrong and I was wrong!

We start with pitching, which was run-of-the-mill Talbot. Three runs on 3 hits, 2 walks and 2 strikeouts. Mitch was yanked after 5 innings and 71 pitches in favor of Travis Hafner batting with 2 on and 2 out, which I was not totally opposed to. Except he struck out. Although Talbot was looking great since he gave up 3 in the first inning, Hafner did have a better chance at getting more runs in than him. Plus, we had the whole #BullpenMafia looking to bust out.

And bust out they did. We got almost the entire gang - Smith, Sipp, Pestano, Raffy and Rage. The only one that had a little problem was Pestano who gave up two hits and a run. But, as Rick from Waiting For Next Year tweeted: "Can't even be mad at Pestano. First run he's given up since little league I think." Yeah, pretty much.

Raffy pitched to one guy and got the win, but it was a big strikeout, closing out Pestano's bad inning. Rage came in and gave up a hit, I think in order to allow himself to get the next 3 out or something, and then he got the save.

And now, the exciting story of our bats waking up!

First off, many thanks to Asdrubal for coming out of whatever funkety-funk he's been in lately (got down to .290. Can you believe it?!) and hitting a 2-run dinger at his first at-bat, surely to impress my aunt and uncle who were sitting in the stands behind him. He went 2 for 4 tonight, bringing his average back up to a respectable-for-Asdrubal .295.

Asdrubal's other hit was a double in the 6th, and he was driven in by none other than sometimes-Indian Travis Buck! Buck also had a lovely catch in the 9th to help out ol' C. Perez.

So - Lonnie Chisenhall! His first at-bat he flew out. Then everyone in Cleveland breathed a sigh of relief as little cousin started off the 5th with a double! Woohoo! Save the ball!

Wait, it gets better! Later on in the 6th he got his first RBI, which was the go-ahead RBI! So, hopefully he'll be back tomorrow. Sorry Adam Everett...

So then Pestano gives up the tying run and we're all tied yadda yadda Orlando Cabrera hits a home run.

Serious! I mean, we have seen him do well in clutch situations and we have seen him ho-hum us at the plate. It was more in the first few weeks of the season that we were wowed. They do say the dry heat is excellent for old folks. Whatever, it was a night for Dos Cabreras to go long and go long they did.

Orlando Cabrera won the game with a home run.

That's why we love baseball, folks - anything can happen!

I don't know if you read the box scores in the morning but check this nonsense out. This is slightly extreme but this is generally how National League box scores end up:

Can you even follow that? Yeesh.

So, I'm pretty happy. Going to go to bed happy. Going to look forward to tomorrow's game and everything, maybe get myself some more popsicles.

Don't forget, 9:40 PM tomorrow and Wednesday. The pitching matchup tomorrow is absolutely even, stats-wise. Can't wait to see what Lonnie Chisenhall has going on in his second game!

Radio Chatter:
"Travis Buck has racked up the frequent flyer miles going between home and Columbus."
- Tom Hamilton

"And how 'bout the kid?"
- Tom Hamilton on Lonnie Chisenhall

"My friend went golfing today, his tee-time was 2:30. Since nobody is outside golfing since it's so darned hot, it was $7 to tee off at 2:30 on a nice course!"
- Tom Hamilton can't believe how hot it is in Arizona